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| TNA: We Are Limpin', Sugah! |
Dedicated to the memory of Paul Servo, a great fellow Crapper, Honorary WCR Historian, Co-Host Contestant and one of the Original 12, who sadly passed away on the 3rd of January. Our condolences and thoughts for his friends and family.
It's a new decade for WrestleCrap Radio, seeing as how they fell off a cliff for them at the end of the previous year, (much like the Canadiens and Lions). Blade wants to talk about wrestling all show for a change. So they talk about...slurpies. But they are wrestling slurpies!
Impact has gone head to head against RAW for the first time (:08) and the Co-Hosses mark out on naked Val Venus and Orlando Jordan in Impact. Popeye calls. You know the drill - pun literally intended. Ah gyuk gyuk gyuk gyuk. WrestleCrap will be 10 years old this April, but RD would like to forget his newsletters. (:14) Perhaps they'll reappear on his next Archive Disc?
:17 Further talking about wrestling (Yes, really). Blade finds something on his script which predicts Popeye's calling in, and the fact that RD finally lost a bet due to his own fault and own confusion over Blade's rules and now has to read whatever people send to him. Send your requests to blade@wrestlecrap.com if it hasn't been featured here yet. RD got some gift glass bottles from his brother for Christmas (I too always prefer glass over plastic). Blade has some own glass bottles in his collection.
:26 Blade is trying to stay sober for the first time in a while. Tammy Sytch with nothing else better to do calls out the Bella Twins for being in the same glass house as she is, or something. RD reads what she has to say in his Dixie Carter impression. Blade fantasizes about Ashley Massaro. He also has some grudge against cutlery and wants to fuck people while cooking food on them. Maybe that's why he keeps calling the Big Nippled Vampire's breasts big and round as a dinner plate. I know there is a term for that fetish, but it escapes me at the moment.
Blade is trying to look and act like a hobo caveman (more so than usual) in an attempt to escape jury duty.
Moe from Men on a Mission (:34) reminds Blade of the Robonic Stooges in a bad recreation of a Dumas novel, itself part of some Skatebirds show which includes a monkey for some reason. Sadly he's not BJ's Bear. The actual Moe is considering leaving the wrestling biz for MMA. One word: Horrible.
Blade wants to know how the BabyTrolla works, which reports that Candice Michelle is having a baby girl due to the actions of her husband. The HorseTrolla reveals Mickie James was in another car accident where she was rear ended. A word of warning: whatever you do, please do not look up 'dragoning'. You'll regret it. There's more fallout from her moving to Smackdown. Blade may finally get his chance, but he's still stuck on Lita.
Sir Alec 'visits' yet again. (:53) This time, Mickie James (speaking of her) finds love with Kelly Kelly but needs John Cena to simplify things.
The WCR Gong has the week's Question. (:60) Could a Jonas Brother appear in a revival of 3 Count? RD finds their theme song. Blade wonders on Britney Spear's fallopian tubes.
:64 Voting has begun for the 2009 Gooker. This year: Hornswaggle vs. Chavo Guerrero, Jenna Morasca vs. Sharmell, Vince's random hatred against the Denver Nuggets, the Abraham Washington Show, Santina Marella as Miss Wrestlemania, TNA's 'portrayal' of Sarah Pallin, and some really bad RAW guest hosting.
Impact and RAW may go head to head on a weekly basis. Oh good, looks like WCW is back. RD compares the radio progrem to mid-90s Scott Hall. The duo pine for those good old days, but would they want Bret Hart to return to the ring? And could he do anything with their wacky nicknames? The two are unsure, so they instead turn to Hulk Hogan.
Seventeen Syllables on the return of Hulk Hogan to TNA:
Hulk's back in wrestling.
Dixie's new tagline? T-N-
A: We Are Limping.
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