Episode 17: Holy Botany!: November 28, 2021

True or False Face
March 9, 1966
"False Face traps Batman and Robin, and binding them to a subway track just minutes before a train is scheduled to come by."
81 minutes

"RD: Asking Santa for a Trick Truck". He underestimated Vince's "issue" in trying to sort out Jeff Lane's "anal-retentive" episode numberings. RD: "I hope you're not renting an anal." He cuts a WWCR style promo against "Jeff Lie". Vince threatens to have him on the show. He tells an anecdote about meeting Jeff for the first time, where he got sick over a 7-Eleven hot dog and threw up into his hands and hat. (:05) He also burps Blade-style.

RD: "Vince McMahon and the golden egg I just wrote 'Gooker'." (:12)

A crown is being exhibited, and an appalled princess tells O'Hara it may be "schhhtollen" before handing him a note from "FF". Somehow he knows immediately who it is.

Vince is surprised such a scary impacting villain only appeared the once. RD is surprised the concept hasn't been explored more in horror movies. He considers the Ed Ferrara Munsters Christmas movie he plans to watch to also be a horror movie.

FF - False Face, not Fred Flintstone - shows up wearing a clear plastic mask of another face on his own. He has to prove he is what he says he is by taking off  part of his beard. O'Hara: "IT'S FALSE FACE! The infamous criminal master of trickery and disguise!" Then Face lights the beard to cause an obscuring explosion to escape with the princess. She drops her cape into a three and a half foot inflating airbag that completely stops O'Hara. Face is so happy he jumps and clicks his heels. 

A car chase ensues with Face in his paddy wagon Trick Truck where everything is labelled. (:19) This includes changing the car into different types including an armored vehicle. Here though it just changes color into a bakery truck and Face into a chef. He is so happy he jumps and clicks his heels. This reminds RD of when the Duo change clothes automatically on the Batpoles and/or when Alfred has something different for them to wear for April Fools.

At Police HQ Gordon...laughs the crime off. At least until they find he already swapped the crown for a false. (:24) "Can't we stop this master of devilish disguises?" Their only hope is to once again call for "that towering power for right and justice, the Caped Crusader."

At Stately Wayne Manor Dick is now learning about trees: "Gosh! Botany is tough! I'll never learn to recognize all these trees!" 
Bruce: "Come come Dick. Pine, elm, hickory, chestnut, maple. Part of our heritage is the lore of living things, the storybook of nature."

Both wrote down that Aunt Harriet has no bra. Vince gives RD applause. 

RD found out Face appeared in Batman #113 in 1958, in the issue where "Batman meets Fatman". For some reason he calls the actor Malachi THORNE (rather than Throne, which sounds a far cooler surname), who continued to do voices in animated Batman. 

At Police HQ Batman appraises the crown at $1 million, far more than any stolen haul so far. An old man shows up with a note for Batman that is deceivingly false. In this case Face wants to give money to a "defenseless little girl" so Robin thinks he means a boy. They determine he actually means the Ladd Armored Car Company. Robin: "Holy bouncing boilerplated fists!" 

Batman also unmasks the old man as Face's henchwoman Blaze. (:35) RD found out actor Myrna Fahey had a stock-ticker in her dressing room, dated George Hamilton and Joe DiMaggio, was threatened by an actual insane asylum patient, and tragically died too young (40) from cancer. RD gives this blond look 7.5 Batpoles. Vince has 8.5. Blaze escapes by jumping through a window onto an FF air mattress. Batman makes puns in response. Robin stumbles in his response.

At his lair Face is so happy he takes off Blaze's blond wig revealing she was wearing the crown underneath it. RD gives this look a 5.5. Vince concurs. He uses the paywall opportunity to call one of this Counterfeit Crew a midget (because of his height). Face speaks in alliteration and his goons cheer: "Thanks men, I know you didn't mean it!" Vince liked he respected his henchmen, even if he spoke in opposites.

At Ladd one of their cars is late. (:44) Batman calls Gordon to inform him they may need to investigate the National Bank it is at. 

Mr. Ladd: "Bless you, Batman. Every law-abiding citizen of Gotham City goes with you today in spirit."
Secretary: "And if it were possible, in body."

RD finds the secretary very attractive, later in the recording giving her 8.5. Vince has to rewatch it to find her for himself.

At the National Bank RD demonstrates the camera Dutch angling to show danger is near. The Duo determine Face is around since he parked so close to a fire hydrant. Face (as a guard) escapes with an exploding money bag onto his Trick Truck, and he leaves with a laugh. 

The Duo's stunt doubles give chase, but are stopped by Face as an old woman with her 'Boy Scout' as his dwarf henchman. This brings up a fight with the rest of the gang with "no joke, literally, midget tossing." (RD) Vince doesn't think it's a bad thing since they were paid for it, although the one here was thrown into a trash can. During the scuffle Blaze gets into the Batmobile and then out of it. As the police arrive Face eludes by smoke bomb. He is so happy he jumps and clicks his heels. 

Gordon is temporarily stymied by Face as O'Hara who escapes with Blaze and real O'Hara in the Trick Truck. The rest of the gang are left to flail about.

At the Batcave the Duo confirm with technobabble principles that a dollar note is fake, and determines Face will print counterfeit money. At the Official Bank Note Printing Company (...a mint?), the Duo enter a heavily trapped place but hide to observe purple haired Blaze entering with the gang. RD gives this one a 7. Vince has 6.5. The Duo jump down to once again beat up the gang and, for some reason, hang the dwarf on a coat rack. Blaze tries to blow a kiss at Batman who blows it right back, then throws her over his shoulders like a sack of produce. 

At Police HQ Face gets away with being O'Hara by mumbling his words because he has a toothache. (:58) Blaze is uncooperative. Robin: "That's pretty dim, Blaze!" Batman hopes to rehabilitate Face "somehow". All of a sudden Blaze now wants to help Batman since he's a good man. 

She leads the Duo to an abandoned subway station and suddenly asks Batman to go get her some candy. Replies he: "Candy? But fresh fruit is much more healthier." Vince wants that on a t-shirt. But there is a candy machine nearby which produces...silver dollars! No, it's just knock out gas, and the Duo are immobilized. Vince complains on all the gas being used.

Face arrives as a steam train engineer, and ties the Duo to the train tracks. And without a false mustache to twirl? Devious. Vince likes that Face did not want to unmask the Duo. He just wanted to (literally) make money. 

Robin: "FIEND!"
Batman: "You'll regret this!...Eventually!"

Blaze on the other hand is reconsidering her affiliation. Before she and Face leave she asks Batman for forgiveness, which he gives. 

Narrator: "Can Batman and Robin break the unbreakable? Slip out of the chemical clutches? ESCAPE THE APOXY? Keep your Batwings crossed until tomorrow! Same time, same channel, same perilous predicament!" 

Vince wonders how many schoolchildren were running home to watch the show. RD's joke about Vince's age gives the latter pause to try and calculate on it. RD references Star Blazers aka Space Battleship Yamato, one of the first influential mecha/animes, or as Vince calls them "robutts".

The two again wonder why Face only appeared the once when he did, especially when Throne did a good job of it. The episode was a good one to them. Vince thinks they'll escape by hitting the lever to move the train to another track.

Vince heard Eartha Kitt's Santa Baby on the radio. RD hates all versions of it. The two disagree on whether Cyndi Lauper actually sang.

Vince is confused by RD being Santa to play against sassy children at Rupert's Kids Arcade for Christmas. He co-plugs it regardless. 

• Special Guest Villain: False Face (Malachi Throne as ?)

• Screen Captures: 1. Vince
• Vince Burps: 1.
• SPEAKING OFs: 1. Nature in the raw

Episode 16: Holy Smoke!: November 21, 2021

He Meets His Match, the Grisly Ghoul
March 3, 1966
"To find out the Joker's goal of his grand scheme, Robin goes undercover into the teenage delinquent underground."
62 minutes

"RD: Disco Tek Alum". Having met Mike Check, I don't doubt that. (Fascinating.) 

Vince is still gushing over their interview with Donna Loren. He admits unlike her he has a bad memory. RD admits that Blade also had a much stronger memory when they were doing the radio progrem (or rather he spent all day reading about himself on this very site).

RD compliments the recapping and the Narrator's dramatic voiceover.

The third lemon comes up - and there's a power outage. RD: "They didn't do anything!" (:05) The Joker is reminded of New York. Vince remembers the "yuge" Northeast Blackout of a year earlier, which according to he produced a "baby boom". RD helps him to find he is wrong from the ever accurate Wikipedia.

The police show up to rescue the Duo.
Cop: "Holy smoke!"
Robin: "Get us out of here before that's what we are! Holy smoke!"

They return to candlelit Police HQ. Gordon: "A mobile slot machine torture van! Why, the mere possession of such a vehicle violates at least seventeen separate statutes." 

In response Batman pulls out a huge reel of tape from his pants. RD thinks it was in the hole in the back of his suit. (:10) Vince: "Interesting." 

They take it to the Batcave's Anti-Crime Voice Analyzer still powered by that Atomic Pile of his...but wait until the morning when overall power returns. Bruce needs recuperation you know, he's not Superman. Vince calls him a vampire, perhaps because of the bat connection. He is also appalled that the Duo's stunt doubles are obviously visible even in wide shots. 

Sad News: After attempting to watch Santa With Muscles (on Blu-Ray), Mrs. Deal does not want to watch any more bad Christmas movies. (:15) RD tempts Vince to watch it with him.

Anyway they determine that Susie is with the Joker. Robin: "Holy Benedict Arnold!" He proceeds to have a huge breakdown as Batman steadies his old chum: "It's an old story I'm afraid, old as Eve and the apple and the snake. The Joker must have promised her some baubles that led her astray." Vince thought he meant breast enhancement.

The two then temporarily forget Christopher Walken's name. Vince suggests Tony Khan. Tony/Walken as Max Shreck in Batman Returns also mentioned baubles. Even the Gotham series had a Catwoman looking like Pfeiffer and Paul Ruebens playing a role.

RD broke a finger within an actual treasure chest while assisting in the Arcade, and put it in a splint to heal. (:24) Vince compares their friendly play fighting to Tom & Jerry.

Anyway, they track Susie to the candystore, and Batman assigns undercover agent Dick Grayson to infiltrate it as "Dark George". He does so in a purple and black leather ensemble where she immediately knows who he is.  "Hiya, Sue-baby, how's tricks?" he says randomly before placing an obvious camera fully visible in front of them without anyone commenting on it. He also calls Bruce a "skinflint" and tries a drag on one cigarette before coughing; he says he's already smoked two packs already. The boyfriend Nick sends Dick to the robbed bar before for some money. Susie asks for Dick to remain with them: "he can climb real good." Nick: "That guy never had a weed in his life."

All of this is observed by the one camera constantly changing camera angles. 

In the back Nick relays his frustrations about Susie to the Joker. They decide to get rid of her after she refills the milk machine. He also gives her "Canadian perfume" to entice her.

Batman also goes to the bar and sends the patrons to the back while he tackles the jukebox. RD wonders why he didn't just send them all outside. He and Robin hide behind a Batshield to block the pop up gun's bullets and destroy the jukebox with a smoke bomb. He then tasks bad liar Robin to help him rescue Susie: "That young lady's life isn't worth a plugged lollipop!" Then to the bartender: "a bit of advice. Always inspect a jukebox carefully. These machines can be deadly."

Back at the hideout Joker makes a bet with his bookie Pete the Swede on Woodrow Roosevelt to lose their basketball game against one Disco Tech. (:38) Vince is a small wager gambler on occasion, his last bet being on baseball in the beginning of the latest season. 

The Duo reach Susie (shockingly on time) but she doesn't listen to them (probably because Batman also calls her an old shoe), and putting on her perfume knocks her out. Nick tells Joker that he believes she's actually dead (not knowing Batman gave her a Batantidote) after putting her on the "meat wagon". Joker: "What's the life of one greedy little dupe?" He then gives Nick an exploding cigar. 

At the gym the team goes for some milk from the machine, which instead spits out test answers. Joker shows up to take pictures of the 'cheating' team to get them suspended...immediately, so that Disco Tech can then face a random scrub team and he can win his bet. RD wonders on the athletic ability of the players as a whole.

Suddenly there's a Batshadow and Batman speaks, except his pose and angle are completely different in another shot. Ready to deliver a "punchline" the Duo swing down to fight a not terribly good battle. During it Joker rolls a barbell at Batman who...steps aside. He then picks it up and throws it back like a soccer ball. Joker tries his sneezing powder, but unfortunately for him Batman already took an Anti-Allergy Pill. He then defeats Joker with his Batarang.

RD wonders why Joker thought betting big on a high school basketball game would be the way to make money. (:50) They have more questions on why Susie is suddenly at Stately Wayne Manor where Dick gives her the opportunity to cheerlead in the Wayne Foundation for Delinquent Girls. Vince wonders if people would raise questions if a certain former president would also make such a Foundation. RD has one. Vince: "Then she kisses Dick. I don't know what that means."

They enjoyed the episode and Romero and Loren's performances, but the whole plot and thing about Dick Grayson, Undercover Agent was a mess. Vince favors the Joker for being physical more believably than other villains even if he is like 7 feet tall (he's been canonically listed at 6 feet).

The two then temporarily forget Jill St. John's name.

RD shills Rupert's Kids for a change since Rupert found an early detected throat cancer. I join RD in wishing all the very best for the man, a genuine fine young egg.

• Special Guest Villain: The Joker [2] (Cesar Romero) [2]

• Brown Hornet Escapes: 1. Power outage

Special #1: The DL: November 14, 2021

63 minutes

"RD is A Pepper Too". (I put him more as a Thunder.) Russo lists his Patreon. He gives himself applause. "You never doubt Vince Russo!"

As stated from last week, and proving a giddy RD wrong for once, Vince has the lovely Donna "DL" Loren (last week's Susie Spirit) on screen with them, coming in from Hawaii. 

• Loren thought Romero was the handsomest man on set. Vince gives RD applause for his correct guess. He was a generous gentlemen, but always in character (what is it with Joker actors always doing that?). 
• Loren: "They didn't shave my mustache either."
• The show was already a big draw even during filming, with many kids trying to stare over the walls of the sets.
• She was never impressed by West who kept trying to fill out his tights. (:12)
• Batman replaced the (music) show she was on, Shindigs, which always had some sort of controversy due to being desegregated. She was hired for the role without needing much of an audition due to having most of the required wardrobe design already, among other things. She once got into trouble for not wearing a bra.
• She confirms to Vince that Aunt Harriet never wore a bra. (:18)
• She felt Susie had courage due to being a younger character but also hopefully a conscience.
• She re-met the surviving Monkees sometime ago.
• She had a very constraining contract as the Dr. Pepper Girl. (:28) However they did help a lot in giving her screen presence. Her audition for it was also a very quick thing. 
• She visited the Batcave and thought it was fun. 
• Joker 2019 was a great movie, but so intense to watch just the once. 
• Shindigs had such great musical talent around it, but unfortunately the racial issues on its broadcast hobbled it.
• It took many years working with a psychologist colleague to write down her life story. (:46) The pandemic gave her an opportunity to tell it as a podcast (Love's A Secret Weapon) alongside her singing, and even involve fan participation.
• After her next show once again encountered race related opposition, she met her first husband who helped her to take control of things and retire from acting with no regrets. (:51) Even so the amount of work she did in such a short amount of time astounds the Co-Bros. 
• She prefers coffee and bagels over cereal, but she will try Captain Crunch for Vince. He gives her applause for it. RD does not know what bagel lox are.
• Husband Jered makes an appearance. (:59) Love is spread amongst the four. Vince gives more applause, as is rightfully due.

Episode 15: Holy Fruit Salad!: November 7, 2021

The Joker Goes to School
March 2, 1966
"When a vending machine in a high school starts dispensing bizarrely valuable items, Batman discovers the Joker is behind this for mysterious reasons."
74 minutes

"RD: No Gimmicked Machines Here" Not even Trolla products? Vince has a new website. He asks RD about his Reds fandom and his Willy Wonka pinball table. Someone had gifted Vince a Batman Tiny TV Classic.

For once, Vince forgot this day's swerve, (:05) in this case of Donna Loren who was on one of Vince's earlier shows. RD is not sure who is no longer with us from the main cast. The Co-Bros check out a few names to ascertain their vitality. Vince: "Interesting."

RD temporarily disconnects. He blames it on Vince almost insulting Julie Newmar on her age. (:09)

At the gymnasium of Woodrow Roosevelt High School (long time rivals of Jefferson Lincoln no doubt), a basketball team handles a basketball for the first time while "young Dick" lifts weights in the corner. Vince did not see any erections in his winter clothing worn indoors. 

RD does the cheerleaders' awkward chant. Vince thinks they're the Knights who say Ni instead of the Knights who say Ekke Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptang Zoo Boing. The chant stops the "basketballers" to applaud (and look for a shrubbery) and Dick wonders if cheerleader Susie (Loren) wrote it herself. She shifts the blame to their poetry professor (not teacher). Vince: "Interesting."

All this bad cheerleading leads them to a milk vending machine. Vince remembers when they had those in schools, but he won't drink it by itself unlike RD (who had the old glass bottles). Vince: "Interesting." The vending machine is actually giving silver dollars which requires a call for the police. Vince plays the wrong clip for RD before the applause. Gordon: "There's a strange bonanza from a gimmicked milk machine." 

Determining that this is the Joker's doing, Alfred has to find Bruce who is talking to one Mr. Vandergilt, who is asking Bruce once again to run for mayor. Alfred: "HEY, IT'S THE BATPHONE!" Bruce is told to come to the high school, so of course he slides down the Batpole to police HQ instead. Apparently Joker was just released last week allowing him to buy the "One Armed Bandit Novelty Company". The two blame Gordon, Warden Criton, and the out of order episode airing. (:26)

Interestingly (non-Vince) as RD relates, pinball was still considered a gambling activity to be outlawed, hence something that the Joker would be (criminally) involved. It wasn't until actual pinball wizard Robert Sharpe demonstrated in a New York court ten years later that play was more about skill than luck that it was finally unbanned.

Principal Schoolfield then calls over speakerphone to report another machine in the library giving out "negotiable" stocks. Batman: "SCHOOLFIELD!!! THIS IS BATMAN!!! DO YOU HEAR ME???" He asks to hold a meeting with student council president "Richard Grayson", then asks for the Joker's "digital ID file". Vince gives RD proper applause this time.

Among the people with Dick is a "nerd" named Herbie. RD does his Nathaniel impression for him, boy oh boy. (:31) Susie gets quarters from Schoolfield's coffee machine to help put Dick in his place. Batman parks illegally in the school parking lot, then has to get out his megaphone to tell the excited people and schoolchildren to stay back from the Batmobile's delicate crime equipment and anti-theft system. 

"In a fashionably little bistro" a heavy drunk finds the jukebox has a message from the Joker for "my cheese boozehounds" in the form of a gun, and the place is robbed.

Batman warns that these handout providing machines are a trap to lead people into "a deceptive pattern of easy-living" to join crime gangs. Make your own political joke here. (:37) He uses a slide projector to show one (1) photo of the Joker standing at 6'8". Romero and his mustache were 6'3", almost as tall as 6'5" RD if that was actually a true number (Romero's, not RD). Vince is reminded of the recent Raw where the interviewer had to reduce his height, so he had to wide squat rather than just about anything else less ridiculous looking. Batman calls Joker "one of the most malevolent malefactors we've ever met", which makes me sad that wasn't also said in any of the animated series. 

Batman asks the "high schoolers that look like their early 30s" (RD) to notice the Joker's lapel flower, at which the CPOC (Clown Prince of Crime) himself pops out of the screen to gloat. Vince gives RD boos since he forgot he only admitted to "shoot a jolly jet through that tiny perforation in that screen." One of the students charges him with school loitering, then punishable by up to $5000 and 5 years. Joker counters by saying he has to be loitering for more than two minutes for that, then runs off. Batman: "You...you JAILHOUSE LAWYER!" Gordon calls to tell him about the bistro robbery, covered by the Joker's alibi of being at the school. 

Batman (to the students): "Go back to your studies. Believe me, nothing in life is free."

The Joker and his people The Bad Pennies Nick and Two Bits are at the Easy Living Candyshop gimmicking further machines, including a shuffle-bowler. Suzie is also there. She demands her payment for delivering some exams, so the Joker gives her a bracelet, a fur coat, and "Mexican perfume". Suzie: "My, this is like some lovely dream!" (:49) RD gives Suzie a "nice solid" 7.5 Batpoles, later rounded up to 8. Vince gives her a "solid" 9, his highest so far. 

In the Batcave Dick studies algebra with Alfred as Batman picks him up. By then Suzie has snuck into the school at night to gimmick more machines. RD tries to screen capture text that doesn't fix the screen so Vince has to boo him. 

Suzie: "How do you stop a dog from barking in July?"
Joker: "Countersign: shoot him in June."

She runs into the investigating Duo to tell them there's trouble again in the gym. Telling Robin to prepare himself, Batman puts a dime in the machine, causing knee-cuffs to emerge and hold the two into knockout gas. "Twelve and one half minutes later," (Narrator) they wake up in electric chairs in a "curious vehicle" tied up to a slot machine. The Joker and Suzie are in front failing to properly disguise their voices telling "the feathered fatman" they could get shocked...or $50,000. Robin: "Holy fruit salad!" The cliffhanger comes after two lemons come up.

The Co-Bros are surprised the show had a young 19 year old (Lauren) on their show. Vince promises to have her on the show next week.

The two enjoyed the episode as well. Even the scheme is something the Joker would do, gimmicked machines or otherwise. RD uses the opportunity to shill Rupert's Kids Arcade. (:64)

Sad News: some of the patrons thought their last Versus was "difficult to listen to". I honestly didn't mind it and its non-Vince interesting background. 

The two find more people to determine their health and/or availability for their show. (:69)

• Special Guest Villain: The Joker [2] (Cesar Romero) [2]

• I did in fact know he was sick:  1. Yvonne Craig
• Technical Difficulties: 1. RD
• SPEAKING OFs: 1. Young Dick
• Screen Shares: 1. RD