The Bookworm Turns
April 20, 1966
"When
Commission Gordon's death is faked by the Bookworm, the Dynamic Duo
must track down the literate criminal to find out what he is up to."
77 minutes
"RD Wants a Blue Van" Don't we all.
Once again Vince prefers 60s Batman to 20s WWE due to its actual characterizations. They agree that the Batman actors "got it".
At a newly constructed bridge dozens of people golf clap a beauty pageant queen who is there to open it with giant scissors while Gordon stands behind her. A blue van run by KGCTV is also in attendance. RD wonders based on his broadcast knowledge (used to voice a fascinating 900 year old disk jockey) that puts the city on the west coast rather than its traditional place in New Jersey. Vince gives him actual applause.
The Bookworm wonders into the shot of the camera as Dick watches this on Stately Wayne Manor by sitting way too close to the screen eating his milk and cookies. (Aunt Harriet was elsewhere wearing a bra.) To Bruce's questioning Dick's recognition, the Boy Wonder points out his "crazy clothes that look like old worn book bindings" of a regular brown leather suit, a desk lamp on his head, and trick eyeglasses "with the secret radio stuff built in." RD uses a headlamp for maintaining his pinball tables. Vince wonders if he wears one during sex.
Bookworm has his goon, or as he calls him a Printer's Devil (an old term for a printing apprentice), shoot Gordon's stunt double off the bridge. Bruce declares they don't need to wait for a call on the Batphone from Gordon's corpse (to be grumpily answered by Alfred, who's not here this episode). He tells a tearful Aunt Harriet that they have to go pay their respects within 15 seconds of his "death".
Bruce: "I solemnly swear by my oath as a crime-fighter that this outrage will not go unavenged! To the Batpoles!"
The Duo run into Police HQ to discuss the situation with O'Hara (:20) as a woman in really tight pants tosses a book (For Whom the Bell Tolls) into the Batmobile. RD wishes he had a copy of the Bookworm's theme with him. O'Hara turns into Mickey Mouse as he loses his mind against "you pasty faced devil!" Then Gordon walks in. His secretary Bonnie rushes towards him in a very sensual manner. RD thinks there's something between the two. Robin: "Holy reincarnation!" Gordon was actually delayed by a ticket by "a monumentally stupid police officer." This causes O'Hara to overdramatically belly laugh and show his bad teeth. Gordon: "Are you anxious to be transferred to the Department of Sanitation?" Batman has to explain the situation "performed by an ex-pert high diver in Bookworm's pay." He then gets an alert on his utility belt from the Batmobile's bomb detector, and he ejects the seat with the book bomb on it that explodes into thousands of pages. The Printer's Devil who is observing all this reports to his boss with a very big book communicator. Batman makes the expected pun on the book's title.
In the Batcave they learn Bookworm is a "failed novelist". RD wonders how such a thing is possible when he and Vince have written some. Vince: "That's a big overtaking man." Batman determines some of Bookworm's plans from the plot of the book (an American is sent to blow up a bridge during the Spanish Civil War).
Bookworm's lair is the expected library, where for once his girl Lydia Limpet is actually his girlfriend. "You're one clever worm, Bookworm." He responds with a soliloquy about books. Vince feels nostalgic listening to RD. Worm then loses his own mind with Lydia wonders why he doesn't attempt to write again, saying he has "no originality" to write anything of his own. Vince wonders why he didn't self-publish. He's about to piledrive Lydia into the ground with a giant book (and according to Vince make her breasts explode) until he sees the book (which looks more like a telephone book) is about self-control and starts speed reading it with his hands, getting the idea to add a "twist in our plot".
Here's a thought; since Batman is all about redeeming criminals, why doesn't he get Bruce to help Worm with the writing and publishing and thus take another villain off the streets?
In the Batmobile the Duo wonder on Worm's motive. (:37) Gordon calls for their assistance, prompting a Batturn which RD demonstrates with his Lego Batmobile. Upon completing the maneuver the Duo then call the Parachute Pickup Service in another Blue Van. Then another Blue Van shows up as the Bookmobile, driven by his other goon Pressman.
Batman declares Worm has "blown up the bridge" through a projected photograph from the Bookmobile. They can't climb up the wall it's on with rope so they instead first use a "Batzoom." As they climb up, the first window celebrity, Jerry Lewis, pokes his head out of a separate window to greet them both. "Holy human flies!"
Having seen the Bookmobile, Batman orders Robin back down by "reverse Batclimb" so they can use the "Batray" at "12000 deci-bells." This draws out Worm and five scrawny goons, leaving Lydia tied and gagged inside the Bookmobile, so they can fight. And by fight, they first run circles around the Duo. Batman: "Wait! Your glasses!" To Robin: "Remember: never hit a man with glasses." Worm hides in a dumpster as the Duo throw in the goons with him, only to find it has a trapdoor which they all escape through. Batman: "You cowardly worms!"
They go to Lydia in the Bookmobile.
Robin: "Holy Cinderella! It's just like a fairy tale!"
Batman warns it could be a trap.
Robin: "She has honest eyes."
Batman: "Never trust that old chestnut that crooks have beady little eyes. It's false. I say we subject her to the most rigid test."
And then he gasses her so that they can take her to the Batcave.
They put her under the Hypermetric Lie Detector to hear Worm hasn't actually told anyone his scheme yet, but it relies on the Duo dying. Unlike many other women actors on the show, Francine York actually had a long acting career on television. Early morning Vince getting on top of his screen to watch the episodes subjected him to seeing her "very bad skin" and thus only 7 Batpoles. RD has 7.5.
Then Lydia starts with the lying, like how Worm plans to steal the Declaration of Independence (now THERE'S a role for Nicholas Cage to play!). Robin gives a huge eye roll.
Batman:
"Another trap, of course."
Robin:
"You could say that again."
Batman:
"Another trap!"
He tells Robin to guard "the crooked girl" while he just leaves to walk into the trap anyway.
Lydia flirts with Robin enough to ask him to read a book about "the complete English history" that when opened gasses him. She calls up Worm on her own communicator: "Bookworm, do you read me? Am I legible?"
Jump cut to Robin hanging upside down in the bell of Wayne Memorial Clock Tower (in memory of Thomas Wayne). (:59) Vince wonders if this infringes on later villain Clock King. Worm soliloquies some more, confusing his goons by asking for the time in bad French or Dutch. After giving his goodbyes he gets the bell ringing with Robin swinging around in it. RD wonders how a villain with "no imagination" can have such an ingenious plan.
Narrator: "Stick merciful cotton in your ears! The death knell sounds tomorrow!"
Vince enjoyed the cleverness and the new villain, even if only for the week. RD agrees, even if he thought the skin in high-def didn't look bad.
Vince asks RD on his opinion of Cody Rhodes leaving AEW. (:64) As he relates and wrote about, he considers this a good thing overall for the two companies and the industry. However they also hope there's a good payoff in the long term. This is also assuming McMahon doesn't continue to lose his mind and squander him.
- Special Guest Villain: The Bookworm (Roddy McDowall)
- Entertain The People: 1
- Blue Van: 3
- SPEAKING OFs: 2. The plus side, Mrs. Deal
- RD Time Outs: 1 (Real Quick)
- Window Celebrity: 1. Jerry Lewis
No comments:
Post a Comment