155 (Heel) Turn Me Loose: August 28, 2009

68 minutes

Everybody's working for the weekend, or so the song goes as RD plays it. He and Blade are hyped up for Mike Reno's later "appearance", though I'm guessing alcohol may also have to do with it for one of them. But there's lots of love for Reno and Loverboy. RD invites the (still angry) Angry Marks to come on his show next week.

And thus the Celebrity TRIP of Mike Reno. (:09) Blade and fellow Crapper Logan went to see Loverboy in concert, and with their PressTrolla passes went backstage to talk to the man and his lovely Canadian accent. We hear the recorded tape of their conversation. (:12) His son wears his leather pants and the band had whiskey in those Donkey Kong barrels in Hot Girls In Love. He also plans to go to Indianapolis to kick RD's ass, in a friendly way of course. (This scares the Co-Host for some reason.) Oh, and Mike's favorite breakfast is honeyed vaginas. To commemorate the occasion the two then watch the video of Dangerous.

The Faxtrolla fires up for Obscure Non-Loverboy News. (:22) Scott Hall and Sid Vicious discover the Internet. Speaking of Obscure News... RD endures a few seconds of their video collaboration (Last Call with Scott Hall Volume 1) before he can't take no more and reads the comments instead, one calling the thing "nice mark service."

Meanwhile Ashley Massaro had some leg surgery for some infection. The Big Show cheats at thumb wrestling at TMZ. The BabyTrolla cries out JT Titty's second birth to a girl. (Congratulations!) (:33) Not to be outdone the HorseTrolla informs us that Lillian Garcia's phone has been stolen, and on her last week with the WWE too. Blade calls for Happy Drinking music for Mickie James' miniskirt, but changes his mind and listens to Hot Girls In Love instead.

Everything in Arizona is tan.

The Horns trumpet for the Question of the Week. (:42) RD met Ultimate Kennedy while in Phoenix, and calls on us to find the Ultimate Questioner for their progrem. He also plans to visit all 12 Listeners in their Unabomber-style shacks. Anyway, Questioner Magic Mark Hurr likes Jim Ross, and wants to know if he likes Jack Hannah. Well, how lucky are we that we can just call him out of the blue to ask this! Jim has a new assistant now from his Rolodex, one Hollywood John Tatum. But he doesn't like Mr Hannah, most likely from him harshing his buzz from eating smoked koala. Apparantly it tastes like chicken

:55 There's still no sign of the new TNA guy. Is he pulling a Peter Gazer on us? So Dixie Carter calls instead. She's going to appear on TV for the first time. She leaves 'early' since she has to go to another toy conference (Sugar).

:59 The good old Coliseum music is heard. There are rumors that WWE is making a new TV channel. Blade wants it to show Diva porn. Loving remembrance of Don Muraco and Mr Fuji's antics. 'Gay masks' at Vince's birthday party summons Gay Popeye. Ah gyuk gyuk gyuk gyuk!

Seventeen Syllables to get us the heck out of Dodge:
Vince McMahon's Birthday.
Gay masks, huh? More like one great
big gay half-hour.

142 Wrestlemania XXV: After the Final Pinfall: April 10, 2009

83 minutes

The Co-Hostess Fruitcakes record about the recent Wrestlemania XXV like some actual wrestling podcast. There's some discussion of Ricky Steamboat's cameo return to the ring. Blade wants "Ricky Steamboat's Chiropractor" as a new character for the show, but oddly for him doesn't commence his usual mockery of cripples. RD would have him played by Dave Meltzer. Some sort of geriatric wrestling happened (which should automatically include Vince). Roddy Piper was seen with what looked like a chestburster in his stomach. Perhaps he ate too much alien ham. (:06) Globalinternet.net's Greg drinking is imagined.

NEVER FEED YOURSELF
AFTER MIDNIGHT

RD's TRIP to the Grocery is no trip at all, but IS sponsored by angrymarks.com. (:12) They sent him some items, containing a Bobby Lashley figure, some Wu Tang collection, a Lucha VHS, Summerslam's Greatest Hits, a Candice Michelle figure, a Tootsie Roll Bank, and some "Late Night Tacos at Midnight" Doritos. The two taste it and conclude it tastes like taco seasoning. It could be worse, it could have had Mountain Dew flavor.

This week on WC FanFiction Theatre (:22), Sir Alec is saddened by not seeing Sunny at Wrestlemania, so he narrates a story of Miss Sytch getting it on with a monkey. (There was more to that
tale' that what we randomly have that was cut out. I don't know if that is a good or a bad thing.)

On Obscure Wrestling News (:32) JT Titty is pregnant. Blade: "It means she likes to fuck." Blade wants a BabyTrolla for the show to report on new pregnancies. There's some negative anonymous review of the Book of Lists Exclamation Point (:36) The book is "Immature perverted and a waste of time." I like him already. Wrestlemania anniversaries. Craig DeGeorge is on Fox Sports and for some reason working with National Cheerleading Championships (if not with the more normal job with Florida Panthers). (:40). Blade Braxton's (naked) Mike McGurk story with Don Mason (with a bad impression of said Mike).

Some Dream Rapist Time, which we haven't had in too long a while. (:46) Blade dreams of Don making Mickie James cry for not taking her picture properly, then finds Lillian Garcia eating hot dogs, and talks with Michael Cole about Heidenreich's sodomy. Quote Cole: "You know, it looked real but it didn't feel real!" They also share random stories of having sex with barely legal women before Mae Young wanders in for some reason.

Question of the Week (:52) concerns the upcoming new wrestling promotion Wrestlicious. The two watch it. (it's also featured on the week's It Came From YouTube!) Could this be the new WSX? The show, co-hosted by Leila "Naked Girl" Milani and Jimmy Hart, is funded by a Powerball winner. ("There are worse ways to try and get a date." - Clarence "Showstealer" Mason) Blade's awkward joke causes RJ Fletcher to laugh backwards.

Mike Check (:61) talks about Danny Partridge, the Radio version of The Patridge Family and his time at WEBN 103 "The Spider" in Cincinnati doing a terrible Mr Belvedere. He then does an example of it for the 12 Listeners. He should do a face-off with Sir Alec. Oddly that's all he talks about this week in his 10 minutes before he plays a Partridge song of his own.

Current Wrestling News (:72) somewhat concerns WWE's bad time management. And this show is more efficient how...?

Time for a Haiku:
Skank Battle Royal.
You can't tell the boobs apart
without a scorecard.

RD: "Speaking of disposing of something like a dirty whore..."

087 Mira-Hall on 34th Street: December 14, 2007

RD marks out for Jillian Hall
(78 minutes)

Yes, that IS Stephanie McMahon wearing a Matilda shirt.

This show has many teases for next week's episode.

The first instant WrestleCrap induction: Julian Hall's five-song Xmas EP. Blade still loves his Matilda stuffed animal. RD has given up trying to have a clean show. Worst ever impressions. Gay wookie kissing. Speaking of transsexual dinosaurs...

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:19): all the Xmas food gimmicks. RD wisely stocked up on Little Debbie cakes before Thanksgiving.

Obscure Wrestling News (:27): Christy Hemme has posed for Jason Beam as Red Riding Hood. Blade and RD explore the Hogan energy drink brother website, with a special appearance by JT Titty. (:33)

Question of the Week from Zane (:37): More praise about TNA's simplicity and how it has spread to other promotions. SPEAKING OF TNA, they beat WWE in the ratings, well, WWE's ECW anyway, well, on a different night too. (:49)

Blade and RD recap Raw's 15th Anniversary show,  (:52) featuring the return of Bastion Booger, this time wearing clothes. Molly Holly got shafted. Blade loved Steve Blackman's gimmick.

A Kinder, Gentler Haiku:
Jillian's jingle.
I have nothing bad to say.
I would ring her bells.

055 Centaurfold: March 9, 2007

Centaurfold

The Great Khali Bunyan

(70 minutes)

WSX is still great. So is the $1 million CGI Bling Ladder. RD wants 20 listeners by year's end from their 13.

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:12): Inviga green energy tea makes RD think of vaginas. Blade: "You just can’t go wrong with molestation humor these days can you?"

Co-Host Contest Week 5: Mike Paulin cannot explain the airplane spin below the equator. (:19) Ray Gun does, however. (:23) Current Tally: 3 of 9.

Faxtrolla (:33): Kurrgan plays Uber Immortal in 300. Photos of JT Titty may be featured at Victoria's Secret stores. RD proposes NES Pro Wrestling: The Movie.

Mail Bag (:46): Arthur Williams has a wrestling question. TNA's arm wrestling match in a steel cage needs to be an induction. Sandman 3G does not know why he listens, but he does think the Great Collie would be great as Paul Bunyan. (:52)

Bad News Brown died. (:55)

WWE wants to set up regional feds around the world. (:57) RD would rather watch a promo by Linda McMahon than by Batista, who is growing more and more robotic thanks to his new girlfriend Robecca. (:61) The ECW New Breed sucks.

Instead of a haiku Blade sings a 'parody' about Ashley Massaro with bad MIDI music. (:66)

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• The Joanie to my Chachi, Mr. Blade Braxton
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Global Internet, IMDB
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 3. Things that pop up, penile references coming out, horrible
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
• Outdated references: 4. Happy Days, G.L.O.W., J. Geils Band (2)
• I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.

• Krankor Laughs: 4
• Weird Al Laughs: 1
  
• WrestleCrap Gongs: 4
• Cricket Chirps: 3
  

 

• Mickie James References:  4
• Ashley Massaro References:  9
• Christy Hemme References:  2

 

• Mailbag
• Arthur Williams: I love the radio show, although it hasn't given me hundreds of hours of masturbatory joy. I actually have a wrestling question. Do you think the LAX-James Gang feud including Konnan and Bullet Bob Armstrong in an arm wrestling six sides of steel cage match deserves to be in Wrestlecrap? Yes.
  
• Sandman 3G: Hey Mr Deal and Mr Braxton, I love the site and listen to the Crap every week. It will be many a moon before I figure out why. I read recently that rapper Timbaland was going to perform at Wrestlemania. I think this man needs to come in as the Great Khali's manager. Every time Khali hits the Khali Chop, Timbaland would yell "TIMBER!" And his theme song would be a Timbaland song comparing Khali to Paul Bunyan. Do you think this could work? Not enough Paul Bunyan references in wrestling.
  

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: N/A
  

045 Banging with WrestleCrap: November 17, 2006

Banging with WrestleCrap
(68 minutes)

RD and Blade are watching TNA's first prime time show. (Unlike last time with the Diva Search though, it's in the background rather than the focus of the week.) They don't understand why there's a hole in the cage.

There were hobo-looking people waiting in line for the PS3's release. (:05) Blade's friend got kicked out for a PS2 when someone else wanted to have sex with him for it. (:09) [Don...Don Mason?]

RD and Blade have to remind us that they are in fact not dead. Unless they've been newly reanimated...

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:19): RD remembers the Star Wars Holiday Special. Hot Dog Roller is available. Blade informs RD of the Deion Sanders Hot Dog Express. "Hot juices exploded into my mouth!" (:27)

Obscure Wrestling News (:34): Stacy Keibler has been asked to go on the Dancing with the Stars road tour. RD was gifted a copy of Grandmasters of Wrestling Vol I. Blade got something about the Adam West Batman TV series. JT Titty is in contention in an online voting competition. (:43) Melly Mel is trying to get into the industry at the young age of 45. Blade "raps".

Mail Bag: DZ thinks the Co-Hosts should have been harder on Vince Russo for some reason. (:49) The Lone Ranger asks a varied question about Ariel's breasts. (:54) Brendan Crabb quoted the first WrestleCrap book in one of his university papers. Blade compares himself to Mike von Erich. (:56)

Survivor Series is coming and WWE wants you to be "banging with Ashley". (:59) RD reads down the card and gets stuck on Samoa Joe. "Please to explain." (:62) Vince's ass is available 'in cartoon form'.

Hot Dog Smore:
Vincent McMahon's ass.
He says that it can do tricks.
Make it disappear.

RD: "The finest advice I think I've ever heard on this here radio show."

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• The Scrappy to my Scooby, Mr. Blade Braxton
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Global Internet, Walmart
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 11. Passé, technology, the worlds biggest tard, all things that are holy, writing a list, five minute rest holds, 69, clips, wheelbarrows and anal cavities, things that are random, things I almost want to get faced with the ‘Final Solution’ on
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
• Outdated references: 5. Don Knotts, Starsky & Hutch, Miami Vice, Cher, Chaka Khan
• I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.

 

•  F-Bombs: 1. Blade
  

 

• RD Time Outs: 1
  

• Shelly Martinez References:  3
• Ashley Massaro References:  3

 

• Mailbag
• DZ: Hey man, I listened to part 2 of the Vince Russo interview you guys had with him a while back and I had to ask: why were you guys such pussies? You didn't call him on all the stupid sh*t he did in WCW. He's very good at being emotional and he talks very well with the purpose of making you believe he's correct. I've heard all his interviews and I'm dying to hear an interview with him where people have the balls to tell him Vince it didn't make WCW any money. People don't do that.
  
• The Lone Ranger: In your opinion what is bigger: the number of injuries Mick Foley had in his career, the number of times Terry Funk retired, the Sun, or Ariel's new tatas? In my opinion it's a huge toss-up. I think she should have been Ariel Titty, JT's sister.
  
• Brendan Crabb: Loyal Australian Crapper for years here, I wrote to RD last year to let you know I referenced a quote from the first Wrestlecrap book in a sociology presentation I had done in university. The topic was that we as a society enjoy sports and entertainment because they are structured in a way that is nothing like our own lives. One of my examples was professional wrestling. Anyway, I'm sure the great literary mind of Mr. Reynolds has been of great inspiration to me and many other students around the globe.  The question is, and Blade seeing as you're in the process of writing a book now your insight here would also be appreciated, if you had to compare yourself to a great literary figure of the past, who would it be and why? Blade as Michael von Erich writing his diary. RD as Fritz von Erich shouting at him.
  

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Buttocks?  Butt out!
  Vincent McMahon's ass.
  He says that it can do tricks.
  Make it disappear.

 

037 Hello Titty: August 18, 2006

Hello Titty
A train-wreck of a show.
(63 minutes)

Todd Grisham didn't always have a face.

RD and Blade watch a Diva Search Special in real time. This apparently involves the following:

• Really bad sound quality.
• Weird Al shouting that you so stupid.
• Diamond Dan's hotline at 317 335 HOTT. Call him instead.
• RD not realizing until too late that not everyone listening to the show actually has a ready recording of the special on hand.
• A trailer for The Marine. See what they say about it here rather than listening to the show. [Hell, the movie is easier to witness than this.]
• RD: "I think more people will hate this show than any other show we've ever done."

I'm not listening to this shit.

As of this writing we're still waiting on someone to make a useful commentary video of this particular episode. Course, though, you'd have more luck waiting for Elvis to come back from the dead than waiting for that to happen. 
- Future PB

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• The tranny to my Carmella, Mr. Blade Brakes-town
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Global Internet, Diamond Dan Hot Line
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 13. Train wreck, a tran wreck, Burger King, cats, cat women, old dead women I would bang, black and white chicks, the Von Erichs, having a cock in your mouth, horrible, a legend returning (2), Ricky Morton
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
• Outdated references: 3. Donna Reed, Mary Tyler Moore, Learning the Ropes
• I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.
  

 

• F-Bombs: 2. Blade, Blade
  

 

• RD Time Outs:  1
• Krankor Laughs:  6
• Weird Al Laughs: 2
  
• RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  2

 

• Ashley Massaro References:  8
• Christy Hemme References:  1

 

• Mailbag: N/A
  

 

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: N/A
  

 

Running Commentary (You’re welcome)

• RD wishes Derek Burgan a successful recovery from hernia surgery (0:06)
• Todd Grisham replaced The Miz?  Addition by subtraction?  (0:08)
• RD ponders how he can watch the whole show. (0:14)
• RD pines for another Kloudi run. (0:16)
• RD predicts this will be thought of as the worst episode ever. (0:20)
• RD rags on Gilmore Girls (0:33)
• J.T. Titty has been eliminated and Blade is distraught at the news. (0:35)
• The Boys see The Marine trailer and try to predict the name of John Cena’s character. (0:37)
• Blade wants to hit the bottle.  (0:40)
• Whatever happened to Tyson Tomko? (0:46)
• HLA anyone? (0:54)
• Hot Ricky Morton talk. (0:56)
• The Deever wins! (1:01)
• The guys decide alcoholism is cool after watching this and Blade considers this on a Buster Douglas upset of Mike Tyson level. (1:02)
• RD wistfully points out that through the confetti, her mannish features disappear. (1:03)
• End Show. Thank God.

035 Real Angry: July 28, 2006

Real Angry
(54 minutes)

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:06): RD's favorite flavor of Life Savers has been replaced.

Obscure Wrestling News (:12): Vince has bought an indoor tennis facility for his mother's hometown, which the sources have no idea what state it is in. Chris Kanyon was dropping the puck at the Gay Games. Sad News: Spirit Squad was sent back to Triple A. (:17)

Mail Bag (:21): Insecticidal Andy Duke thinks the Deever is a secret Kryptonian. (:26) Speculation ensues on whether JBL is a secret third co-host of the show. 'Damn' asks about combined bad gimmicks. (:30) RD is worried his son will one day find out about and listen to the show. He also wanted to be the next Weird Al at one point; Blade meanwhile wanted to play Jason at a donkey show. Bob Dhalstrom has his own ideas for the company to follow on, one of which involves Gene Snitsky and Stephanie McMahon. (:34)

J.T. Tinny with unnamed person

Random people fell victim of the Wellness Policy, including Thumbnail-toothed Great Khali-Collie. This angers RD for some reason. (:35) The Diva Search made Blade hit the bottle this week. (:44) Blade talks loudly, unaware that the talky end of the phone receiver acts as a microphone. JT Titty should tag with Areola, the tarot card reader. (:47)  ECW has DQs in "Extreme Rules" matches. Mike Knox, Mr. Charisma. I can't hear RD beneath the music.

Seventeen Syllables of the Weekly Wrestling Haiku
Flair, Undertaker,
then Kane. E C Dub, Extreme
Crossover Wrestling.

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• The liver to my elevated enzymes, Mr. Blade Braxton
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Global Internet, The Wrestling Observer pg. 12
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 7. People who are jerk offs, sucking, getting spanked and put to bed, getting in touch with people, one of our 12 listeners, The Diva Search, retarded
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
• Outdated references: 3. Maude, Jack Lalane, Dirty Dancing
• I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.
  

 

• F-Bombs: 1. Blade
  

 

• Ashley Massaro References:  2
• Trish Stratus References:  3
• Shelly Martinez References:  9
  

 

• Mailbag
• Insecticidal Andy Duke: Dear Real Deal and Bladerick Brakestown, it has come to my attention that one of the Diva Search contestants is named Layla L, the one with the curly hear. Her name is Layla L, much like Superman who was named Kal-El. Mr. Brakestown, do you think she used her super Krypton powers to win the Diva Boot Camp? Could this be a future gimmick much like Christy being on crystal meth, and Ashley being a Hot Topic hobo? Also could you mention the Cidal Squad on the air? JBL, don't steal our gimmick man.
  
• 'Damn': If you could combine two crappy gimmicks into one, what would they be? I would combine the Zombie with 3 Count and ripoff Thriller in every match he was in. Blade: Summerslam 88 Elizabeth with Naked Mideon.
  
• Bob Dhalstrom: So since Stephanie has had her baby girl, am I the only one who sees dollar signs in a Stephanie-Snitsky feud? It is what it is.
  

 

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku:
  Flair, Undertaker,
  then Kane. E C Dub, Extreme
  Crossover Wrestling.

 

034 Diva Debacle: July 14, 2006

Krankor hits the Bottle with JT Titty
(63 minutes)

RD's Trip to the Grocery: Wal-Mart has restaurant gift cards. (:09)
Blade's Trip to the Grocery: "pasta in sauce with beef and chicken hot dogs with beef."

Faxtrolla semi-exclusive news (:14): boo-rah. The Miz wants Johnny Fairplay to come to ECW. DDP is taking his Yoga for Regular Guys on tour.

Mail Bag: Smash Bradley asks how to actually implement Siamese twin wrestlers. (:23) Krankor's laugh is used in response. Extreme K of Fort Mike Knox thinks of putting The Great Collie in a dog outfit and placing him in dog shows. (:27) Sausagesandwich is one of their 'many fans, of whom I know none', who has a thing for punching the Miz. (:30)

SmackDown is looking retro, with Tatanka and caskets and midgets and kings. (:34) A Punjabi Prison match was announced and Michael Cole said it would be in the jungle. (:36) Candice Michelle was sent to ECW to teach Kelly Kelly how to strip. (:39) Big Show's hands are now cannonballs and his head is a bowling ball. CM Punk doesn't like drinking, so Blade hit the bottle. (:44)

ECW IS STRIPPING

Miz's hosting of the Diva Search segment was pure wrestlecrap. (:48)  Hopeful Layla said she wanted to be the Deever, so she will now be called that. Another candidate (Maryse) used her impenetrable Quebec accent to be an 'air-flying diva', another (Robecca) tried to pepper spray the ring, and another (Molina) looks too much like Ashley Massaro.

Miz called one contestant JT Titty.

The Haiku:
Moronic Divas.
How will this class top last year's?
Leave it to Deever.

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• The Jack to my Daniels, Mr. Blade Braxton
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 1. Global Internet
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 11. Last week, last week’s show, The Miz, mounting Chloe and doing her doggystyle, bags, reaching down into my bag, my bag, sodomy overtones, the elderly, transvestite, chesticles
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
• Outdated references: 1. Nancy Reagan
• I didn’t even know he was sick: 1. Nancy Reagan
  

 

• Debut: Krankor Laughs: 9
  

 

• Ashley Massaro References:  4

 

• Mailbag
• Smash Bradley: Hello dear lords of Crapsalot. I've pondered this question and got several answers. If there were a set of Siamese twins (explain what a Siamese twin is: one set of legs, two torsos), would they be considered a single wrestler or a tag team? And if you pick a tag team, how would the tags work? Be careful if you read this, because John Laurenitis might go on the hunt. Krankor: HA. HA. HA. HA. HA. HA. HA.
  
• Extreme K: I am writing to you from Fort Mike Knox where the nation's supply of Art Donovan approved bathroom scales are stored. I think it would be an awesome idea if you put the dog exterior from the Shaggin' Wagon on the Great Khali and renamed him the Great Collie, and then you could proceed to enter him in the Westminster Dog Show. My question to both of you: would Daivari's bitch win, and do you think the Dog Show would once again preempt Raw just for the sake of giving Smackdown a quick upper hand in the brand extension, in terms of rating and publicity? Blade: Mounting Chloe, Torrie Wilson's dog.
  
• Sausagesandwich: I live in England and have to say that I am one of your many, many fans, of whom I know none. Your radio show never ceases to amuse and offend me. I have two questions, both are well urgent. Number one: if you had the choice, would you punch Miz in the face one time as hard as you could, or ten times at medium force? Personally I would punch him just once, then kick him in the balls, but to each his own. Number two: If you were to be in WWE, and were allowed to choose your own gimmick on the grounds that it made Wrestlecrap, what would it be? Myself, I like the idea of the One Headed Man. Blade: Slap my Miz around twenty times. No sold.
  

 

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Repeat Gooker alert!
  Moronic Divas.
  How will this class top last year's?
  Leave it to Deever.