206 Hulkanymphomania: March 9, 2012

79 minutes

Unexpectedly the radio progrem starts with actual wrestling news: Hulk Hogan has a sex tape, and he's not doing it with Linda or Brooke or his current beau. Or Ed Leslie, thankfully. For more 'information' on it, skip to the last five minutes.

The duo worry that from talking about this new revelation they won't talk about anything else. Of course, they don't talk about anything at all. I don't see the problem here.

RD meanwhile is to collaborate on his own videos (...wasn't he already doing so?). He is going to work with his former fellow Fighting Spirit Magazine correspondent and equal reporting legend Bill Apter (:04), the first product of which is to be uploaded in the next week. Not to be outdone, Blade reveals how he used old Apter mags as expensive coloring books, and that the Midnight Rose will be in New Jersey in June to appear in person on Vince Russo's YouShoot recording. (Feel free to write potential questions here if you're a registered member on the forum.) Recent inductee Brakus is with Fantasio on some interview online which I'm too lazy to find. (:10) The Boogeyman now has a rather rude name.

RD wants another telethon (:15). Sad News: Blade lost his Jerry Lewis button.

RD needs a new sponsor to replace Global Internet for some reason, so he reads a 10,000 page ad copy from The Shining Wizards Wrestling Podcast, one of which is that guy who gets aroused by Blade's burps. RD has to admonish Brad for interrupting him while doing so.

Until April 1st, the 'WrestleCrapMania 2012 Sale' has all the DVDs from $16.95 US. Blade wonders about listening to all the shows in a row. I was bored enough to do that once. Let me tell you, it should be banned under the Geneva Convention.

Sad News: Payton Manning's been future endeavored by the Colts because they suck without him on the field. (:27) RD pisses off Blade by now deciding to also cheer for the Bengals, the Giants, and whoever Payton's new team is. My money's on the Jets, Bills, Cardinals, Chiefs, or the Rams. Hell, he may even fuck with people's heads and play in the CFL. Hell, he should go to Canada and quit football entirely. I can totally see him as General Manager for the Canadiens and piss off the Quebecois media for not speaking French yet. Or he may even play on the ice and probably score more in one game than Scott Gomez's done all season.

Long digression over, RD mourned this occurrence by taking a TRIP to the Louisville Arcade Expo. Long discussion about old school gaming follows. In Jefferson, he saw something for "Churro Cereal" and one of Jerry's Restaurants and saw a restaurant called Moby Dick with a really angry mascot. Unfortunately (or fortunately perhaps?) Popeye does not show up to crack jokes. (Ah gyuk gyuk gyuk gyuk.) Blade yawns, fascinated by all this for sure. He saw an RD's Liquor Store once while on the road.

"He piled upon the whale’s white portion the sum of all the general appetite and
hunger felt by his whole race from Adam down; and then, as if his stomach had
been a mortar, he burst his cold mouth's tongue upon it."

Blade is flabbergasted by the fact that they've only gotten to Obscure News 43 minutes in. Our good friend Joanie Laurer is in yet another porn film, this time as She-Hulk. RD wants Stan Lee to make an appearance, though perhaps not necessarily participating with her. Blade's friend once went in blackface. This silences RD. I would be silenced too; I didn't know Blade was a good friend of Ted Danson. Perhaps HE can be a Celebrity Tripper to the Grocery in the future.

The Big Nippled Vampire still hasn't called yet as she is in a Funny or Die video. (:48) RD does not remember Ute Luddendorf who is NOT in one. He does remembers Patrick Warburton though.

"Satan" pays a visit. (:52) His Tubular Bells sound different again. He's somehow corrupted a HorseTrolla into a "DevilTrolla". I personally think someone's ripped the Prince of Darkness off. The only Daemonic-style HorseTrollas that are sold (The DreadSteedTrolla) look more like a Khornite Juggernaught. I'm surprised he hasn't yet seen the "Made In Elysium Fields" tag on the side and called Trolla Customer Support about it. On the other hand, he DID make a fuss about the Ratings Reaper not paying him $15,000 for some reason, so I can see that he would be hard up to buy a counterfeit knockoff rather than the real thing. Hell, I could have hooked him up with one for free as a gift.

Anyway, there's something about Mickie James making no sense online. "Satan" really needs better writers for the stuff he makes his 'subjects' say. Again, he probably just can't afford them.

Pete from Austria has the Question Complaint of the Week (:58), attacking RD's knowledge of German and the fact that Austria and Germany are two separate countries. Next RD will have us believe that Africa is a country.

The Honky Tonk Mailman's not around again (smart man) so Nintendo John calls instead. (:63) He doesn't like the new WrestleFest remake and he loses his composure for some reason. Blade wonders if he's anorexic from his appearance on the Roast. Well of course, if he subsides on power-ups with no nutritional value (on the Nintendo). His crowd stays behind to cheer.

Blade loses his train of thought. I'm shocked, I really am. (:68) New Jack and Brian Knobbs got into a backstage brawl, easily won by the former ECWer. Blade's forgotten about Brock Lesnar already.

The two then spend five minutes on Hogan's sex tape (:74) That's six more minutes than I would have given it.

Seventeen Easily Digestible Syllables:
Hulk sex-tape on way.
Something I don't want to see:
One eye of Hulkster. 

RD: "I like how you did that haiku. It kinda sounded like Chief Jay Strongbow doing it."



What's this? Only one Jar transgression? (0.50c) That's not possible. Or I just didn't pay attention as usual. Someone remind to give this another listen.
$4.50 (plus the $19.99 The Price Is Right).

203 Erectile Misjunction: December 2, 2011

81 minutes

Random musical discussion plagues us on this "Wrestlemania" of the progrem, so Mike Check calls to join in. (:05) RD Strongbows him. "There's no one listening to this show now," he says before he begs (to no one listening to this show now) for gifts (get them in before the 13th, kids!).

RD on Blade's rowdiness: "Sometimes we have creative differences."

Tom Cruise in Born on the Fourth of July really likes his penis. (:11) An interested Popeye calls. (:14) No no no Popeye; TRAVOLTA is the closeted Scientologist, not Cruise. He calls out Blade on his bisexuality.

If all that excites you, their annual Black Friday Sale is still on. Call now, pain later.

:21 RD's Black Friday was different this year; more and more stores are having Black Thursdays, which is really missing the point of the whole thing. His nearby Toys'R'Us seems to be in Roddy Piper's Neighborhood. At Wal-Mart a girl in a shopping cart was pulling herself along and throwing things on herself. Blade was too tired to make fun of cripples. What has this world become?

:39 Hell's frozen over as the Midnight Rose and Stubby and "The Black Friday Scorpion" went Black Fridaying and got called out by a well meaning lady with supernatural hearing. The "deal of the night" to Blade was flirting with a mother and daughter. RD calls him out on his "Wrestlemania moment".

:43 Dusty Rhodes is naked in an upcoming Christmas movie...available January 17th. Popeye wants a starring role. So too does Jim Ross. (:47) He's stuck having 'fun' with Dark Journey erotica and being out on Black Friday being arrested for selling meat in a Wal-Mart parking lot. He thinks working with Dusty would help him with...something. RD doesn't know what he wants. Neither do I. Has Jim been hitting the turkey beer lately?

:52 Matt Hardy's random Giants lady girlfriend wants an 'honest, sober boyfriend'. This is Sad News to Blade, another lost opportunity to no longer be single. Even more Sad News: Blade's not 'drinking'. I still don't believe him. Even more more Sad News: RD's fantasy football team is failing (He's 9th of 12 as of this writing).

:57 "Satan" has dieting tips for the season. He also has some sort of 'feud' with the Ratings Reaper because he won't loan him $15,000. "You don't know the value of the dollar in Hell," he protests. And I thought the feud was because the two sound so similar...He narrates New Jack's refusal of Sunny's alleged desire to kill her boyfriend.

:64 Blade is too lazy to answer any Question of the Week.

So too is the Honky Tonk Mailman lazy to appear. I can't blame him.

:66 Remember when RD was supposed to do the Crappies in 2008 but forgot about them entirely?

The big news this week is the brouhaha over Sin Cara's phallic shirt. In what definitely seemed like a good idea at a time, 'Sin Cara's Penis' calls. (:72) I have no idea of half of what he's saying because he sounds an awful lot like a Stubbed Ratings Reaper.

RD: "Our Wrestlemania show, you're to tell me!"

Seventeen Syllables for us:
Penis on T-shirt.
Greatest Christmas gift ever.
Too bad it got yanked.

$5.00 (I'd use that to buy Blade condoms for his pleasure) ($44.00 and The Price Is Right for $19.99)

198 Null-Stars: July 22, 2011

82 minutes

Using the opportunity of C.M. Punk 'escaping' WWE with the belt, Triple H has finally taken his revenge against Vince for putting him in The Chaperone and has temporarily replaced him on screen. My advice for his first order of business: remove whoever is running WWE Studios with someone more competent.

A rare deal this week only: you can have the Archive Disk for only $15! Related to that you can also get Blade's limited Midnight Rose shirt until August 15th.

:12 Blade wants to search the "Canon" to find how long his Doug Jarvis-style Mickey James mentioning streak has lasted. (Heh, it's funny seeing the legendary Hab winning his 6th Stanley Cup as an assistant coach with Boston) While I CAN tell you when they started talking about her in the first place, I'm not that much of a fool to go over the episodes AGAIN to pinpoint any gaps and holes in that streak. Not unless serious bribes are involved. Anyway, there's more shilling of this very site. RD wonders if a (no doubt fascinating) segment named "To Quote Mike Check" would be the next Fantasy Booking Island.

:17 Blade thinks the show is menstruating. I think it's more like it's going through menopause. RD's been in Europe much of the year, but he only took the opportunity just recently to go visit Disneyland Paris. At right is an example of what is considered a fun ride for young children. Speaking of unbroken hymens...sadly Popeye does not call in claiming to have made the ride. Shockingly Blade is not drunk...yet. Again, he's probably getting his 'caffeine' in Irish coffee. Cap'n Crunch Treasures are King Pedophile cereals in disguise. (:25) Sadly Popeye does not call in here either to show his approval.

:29 The Big Nippled Vampire was once supposed to be on the radio progrem against Damien Demento but for some reason she sadly couldn't make it. Sad News: her webpage was down at the time of recording (it's up at the time of writing.) Sir Alec is summoned to try and take her place. (:35) He has another Shawn Michaels 'story' about him against PETA.

New Jack has been rather heated against his former girlfriend Terri Runnels, she of the house scam. (:43) Sad News: according to him she was spreading a venereal disease around the locker room. Sadder News: she was once involved with New Jack. Saddest News: remember when Don's friend fucked a horse?

:47 Satan's Tubular Bells are back to their regular 'normal' sound this week. He can't get inside Google Plus yet though. Those anti-daemonic wards must still be working. He reads for us more of New Jack, who apparently has 'naked photos' of her. Even worse is Gene Snitsky 'hacking' his own page to insult the Miz and his fans because he has a hot girlfriend instead of a foot fetishist bounty hunter angle.  Good news is RD doesn't bother to censor him this time. His daemonic powers are probably at full power today.

:54 The BNV had some rather strange ring names. Poor lady, she must be far too nice to ask for more dignified sounding names. The Question of the Week is from Dallas James who is lonely and wants to crash a party. RD wants one made for the 200th episode. Blade wants uploaded footage of character dress up to be discussed on said episode.

:59 The HTMM is again a no-show so Jim calls instead. (:62) He needs a taste tester and takes the time to mock "Johnny Age" and can relate to a TNA Knockout's face paralysis. Then he abruptly leaves. 

:67 Blade does his Mike Tyson impression. C.M. Punk stores his belt in his fridge to make it Mountain Cold. RD can't help but watch a old clip of a random lady shooting on someone. Why she's not currently on Raw is a mystery for the ages.

Vince's fashion sense is as impeccable as always.

All kinds of stuff:
Vince in salmon suit.
Goodbye to wrestling, hello
Chicken of the Sea.

$5.00 ($28.00)



What's this? Blade's crossed the $25 mark with flying colors? Why, this calls for...well, a prize! Something bonus that can be fit into the jar (if physically possible) to commemorate this fantastic milestone.

What do you have for us, Rich?

That's right P, it's The Price Is Right computer game! Now you too can have fun coming on down in the comfort of your own home! Get on the Showcase Showdown, get the chance to win a brand new car, or even just mess around just to hear those legendary losing horns while flirting with Carey's Cuties. It can be done with this Nintendo John Seal Of Approval game right in your hands! All this in stunning Windows XP-era graphics for the amazing actual retail price of $19.99, but only if...The Premier Is Right! Back to you, P.

($28.00 plus TPIR game for $19.99)

(Many thanks to Robert Q. Seidelman for the item recommendation. Check out his site here. Trust me, it's far more funny than anything I could write.)

188 Buying Buttons: December 3, 2010

87 minutes

Blade being still as lazy (and drunk) as ever gives RD pause. He and Don went to a Misfits show and went to the dentist's (though not at the same time.) He attributes this to 'basic chemistry'.

Sad News: RD & Blade are currently at the bottom of the FF league...while I am second. Hmmm. Blade's brother-in-law had a fantasy team named the Manboobie Bombers. I'm surprised Blade didn't beat him to the punch to name his own team that.

:20 Mama keeps breaking plates. RD's latest Black Friday outing took him to three stores opening earlier than usual. At Target the woman in front of RD has troubles getting a discount with candy bars. At Meijer someone had a full cart of strawberries and one (1) cucumber. Popeye is interested. At Menards the Chick-Fil-A cow paid a visit providing free cocoa for all. A woman in line used a wheelchair for a cart. Perhaps she somehow gained temporary superhuman strength to get through the day's challenges? [Well Black Friday Woman would make a better superhero than Subtracting Man at least - Clarence]

:42 Blade & Corey & Don went to see the Misfits while in Kansas. (Blade is reminded of that time Don peed on a cripple.) Wearing his Rose mask he managed to get Jerry Only to go with a Celebrity TRIP with him, where we find that he loves the Peanut Butter Crunch and calls RD an elephant.

:52 'Satan' calls again. Marty Jannetty is now rapping on New Jack's FB page. His 'lyrics' are so bad that even RD has to censor him. That's unnecessary in my opinion; after all, only 12 people listen to this show and they're probably too socially insecure to contact their local representative to tell them their sensibilities are being offended. Bah!

:59 Was Mickie James exposed? She had some sort of nipple slip and her dress went flying away while performing. Blade is of course very amused.

:63 RD prefers Blade's Question to the one actually sent this week (by Shawn). A minute later John Kelly calls to discuss Jeff Hardy's strange looking belt. He's so bad that David Lee Roth soundboards in just to say "No." Is he the new Chief Jay Strongbow now? RD wastes time reading about a children's game on Wikipedia.

:73 Someone (Caitlyn) wins on a show (NXT) not even on TV any more. New world champion Miz went against Jerry Lawler for a bit. Blade discovers Hardy's belt has Don's mask on it. Looks like it's time for Jeff to bring out the corn oil! John "Yawn" Cena still shows up on TV despite being 'fired'. His Mexican cousin Juan Cena is now on the air with him.

Seventeen Holiday Syllables on him:
Mexican Cena.
What is his Spanish catchphrase?
"¿You can't si me?"

157 I can't get no Stratusfaction: September 18, 2009

74 minutes

RD is angry at Trish Stratus' new brunette hair color. Of course Blade thinks otherwise. Even Gay Popeye turns temporarily hetero at the thought, which for some reason makes his music longer than normal. (Ah gyuk gyuk gyuk gyuk.) RD tries to persuade them with a haiku.

Trish is now brunette.
What more can I really say?
The thrill is all gone.

Oh, so we can leave early then?

Wait, there's another hour of this left to go.

Fuck.

Still no Celebrity TRIP (:11) so instead Blade has to make do with more on Gymini dolls. Bad news: none have been sold this week. Good news: a plastic sticker has been stuck on the back of the damaged Doll so it can join the rest.

Obscure News: (:17) Blade needs to reach the 5000 friend capacity on Facebook. Ivan Koloff has a strict screening policy on his networking sites. Blade fails all his requirements. RD looks at Blade's student referrals on his Facebook page. New Jack is once again acting like a drunken fool on Myspace so Blade has Sir Alec read his drunk bulletin. (:29) The Zombie is now a father! RD wants him to give parenting tips on the show. The HorseTrolla says Mickie James' implants have burst. Blade needs to sing about it, so he does. (:38) In response the Midnight Rose calls with Tony's Theme; he likes Trish too now. (:40)

Question of the Week (:43) from Brian J. who wants to know why he should watch RAW when football season is upon us. (A good question, for once.) RD saw the Pats vs Bills game and insults the Bills. He doesn't like Tom Brady either so he sings about him. Blade doesn't like it so he sings another song against him. Thankfully he only gets so far, so he tries again with another angle. That also fails.

RD gets Johnny 4 for his line of the week. (:52) "Jim Cornette got fired fired fired stay away from dairy queen queen queen queen queen," he says. RD: "Worst TNA Correspondent ever."

Jim Ross calls in to gloat. He's still on the hunt for Dark Journey, AKA Linda Newton, who seems to have taken a Dark Journey off the face of the earth.

Drugs? Naaah!

Current News: (:60) Hulk Hogan has a wrestling company named Hulkamania touring Australia in November, of which he is in the main event against Flair. Blade saw the only copy of Brooke Hogan's new CD which terrifies him. He tries to link her songs to wrestlers. Jeff Hardy has been arrested for drug dealing, and may be facing jail time for opium, of all things. Blade shows his support for him through a loud burp.

Blade sings for his new love Trish.

146 The FM Menace: May 22, 2009

77 minutes

Mike Check is 30 days away from 'breaking' Johnny Six's record, before he misses doing so and the Co-Hosses are left to find yet another TNA person. Or perhaps resurrect Nathaniel, the greater of two evils. The Sad Music is played for that inevitability, and all the other former deceased people before him, except Stubby who somehow returned. Blade: "Things like that happen sometimes."

Mike himself is on his Death Trip Whirlwind Tour across the mainland, to increase buy rates for a show listened to by 12 people. He's at a convention for the 10th anniversary of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace at some vague place or other. Sadly, he's not there with Blade's friend (Corey Horny) Diamond. Blade wants a Photoshop of Sith Lord Alfred Hayes as a ghost in Return of the Jedi.

Greg is not happy about a globalinternetbrothel.net, taken or not. Blade has fantasies of ventriloquist dummies. Did I mention the May Mayhem Sale? Blade is selling Stubby-signed prints. (:14) SPEAKING OF people spending money, the offer to buy the Katie Vick outfit has increased to $1200. Blade wants it to be higher, else he'd probably have sex in it again. [SELL! SELL! SELL! --Iggy]

Image by The Sam

Let's go to Mike Check at that convention. (:16) Some random playing of the theme song from 'down the hall' is heard as Mike reports in with numerous WWCR The Whacker bumper stickers. While talking he bumps into sound bites of a probe droid, a tauntaun, a swearing Trandoshan, some 'red trashcan', and some roving band of Jawas speaking 'Mexican'. He essentially has no idea where he is or what film he's meant to cover. But he DOES get a Virgil-style hit to the groin from the aptly named Jake Lloyd Jr. Quote he: "YIPPEE!" RD jokes on Mike still non-reporting on TNA news, although these new-fangled Star Wars movies seem like news to report for the fellow Crappers.

Obscure Wrestling News: (:24) While Terri Runnell's house contest/spam has been canceled due to the lack of gullible people, the ripped-off entrants still have to be refunded their entry fee. The real Terri thinks they've already been paid. Sad News: she really wanted to help those people. Even more Sad News: The (outdated) site is still up to steal money, as far as I can tell. (:31)

More news about Ashley Massaro: A site has a list of clients to her service, including Mickey Rourke. Blade makes another reference to his lactating escort roommate. Some random discussion about the Diva Search 'winners' turns into talk about midgets and a possible Midget Search, with Bridget the Midget and Midgets bouncing on couches, which is the only thing RD can remember from watching wrestling from the past four years. Blade insults them all the while. What happened to cripples (and standing up for them)? Randy Orton, Father Time. (:41) RD does not understand him. Jillian Hall is engaged to a Dick. (:42) Gymini dolls. Blade wants to see how well the nearby store sells them every week.

Jillian Hall with 3 caramel apples

Sir Alec makes a return Fan Fiction appearance. (:46) No story again, but he does read us some random Myspace message from New Jack. He's angry at everyone!

Question of the Week. (:52) Listener #4 Goldenbane thinks people were angry Roddy Piper was fighting with Robert Downey Jr. Perhaps he didn't like that Charlie Chaplin biopic of his. Blade still wants to see some anus action.

Mike Check Strikes Back! (:56) He saw someone in Mandalorian armor calling himself Boba Foot, but he hasn't seen many women around yet. We're just in time to have him watch a lightsaber duel too at a dangerously close distance. Don't they have safety regulations at those places? Sure enough he gets 'struck down', Blade doing his dramatic "Noooo!", but it's only a flesh wound and he's alright...for now. He plays Debby Boone's You Light Up My Life. (What with their being 'light' sabers and all.)

Before we can talk more wrestling about Ric Flair and Vince's feud with the NBA (what, on this show?) Jim Ross calls. (:64) He's angry - again - but at this point the sauce has already dried on the rack of ribs and not had that much of an effect anymore. He's angry at working twice as long, or something or other. He also calls Michael Cole a certain term, which RD finds offensive enough to bleep out, despite the fact that they've been saying it over the years without doing anything about it. Perhaps RD's being forgetful. He wants some human/jawa barbecue as seen in A New Hope. He has some video blog Big Announcement next week, meaning has Blade has three things he'll want to tell us but then will promptly forget about.

The HorseTrolla asks about Mickie James' new outfit. (:71) Vickie Guerrero is some sort of dancing Miss Wrestlemania.

Seventeen Inches:
Vickie's got the Sash.
She's Miss Wrestlemania.
She doesn't miss meals.

Video: Mike Check at a Star Wars Convention

084 Kung Fu Jesus: November 16, 2007

Pictured: Mickie "Lifting The Tail"

Not Pictured: Blade

Kung Fu Jesus
(90 minutes)

Blade offended a thirteen-year-old. Chris Engler, now suddenly of the Trolla Corporation, sent Blade a ShirtTrolla for his TV appearance.

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:22): "Humane" mouse trap. The Dusty Rhodes book has a Myspace page. RD swears.

Faxtrolla: Trolla products stop the awkward silence. (:31) New Jack started a new wrestling promotion, in Cincinnati, and its first event is at the Intense Arena. Random singing ensues. Gorgeous George dances on the pole at Gorgeous Frankenstein gigs. Carmen Electra sued the Naked Women's Wrestling League for the $300,000 they have yet to pay her. That should have been a warning sign right there: being offered that much as a non-wrestling celebrity by a wrestling promotion which is not just not WWE, but instead named "Naked Women's Wrestling League". [Also why is it not inducted or featured yet? - Future PB] (:39) Joanie Laurer changed her legal name to Chyna Doll. (:43) This week's It Came from Youtube is the Ultimate Warrior at a Thanksgiving Parade. (SPEAKING OF odd legal names.) RD has a Mii. (:46) A game based on Dancing with the Stars for the Wii will include Stacy Keibler. She may be obscure, but she looks far better than any Diva on the active roster.

Question of the Week (:53): The Co-Hosts get 'hundreds' of questions, and yet only read those from the same handful of people. This one's from Citizen Raider, who likes Carlito's hair. Sadly it may not be on TV for long, as he may be on his way out. Blade says Sable's Playboy pubic hair was photoshopped. Preemptive Sad News: The Deever may be fired. (:58) The producer of WSX will be on WCR in two weeks.

TNA will hold a Turkey Bowl. (:70) RD has eaten at Restaurant. Belt it as a mini. What If Jesus Knew Kung Fu? (:79) A Black Friday Sale is upcoming for the site. Cena says he was 'misquoted'.

Seventeen Freakin Syllables:
Save us, 6 2 2.
What is Chris gonna do? Mur-
der all creative?

053 Linda Love: February 23, 2007

"Worst promo Ever!"

Linda Love
(67 minutes)

Blade is sick and sounds like The Penguin, as played by Burgess Meredith. He promises to be professional. Then he coughs into the microphone.

RD and Misses RD ate Valentine's dinner at White Castle. (:04)

Co-Host Contest Week 3: Thomas DJ does not like Russians. (:11) Niko Blade (:19) misses an important rule: You must answer the question. (Although Blade does admire his balls.) Current Tally: 2 of 6.

RD's Return Trip to the Comp-U-Mart (:22): Salisbury Steak guy is gone. Instead a man smelled like KFC 'extra stenchy'. Blade and RD cut promos against Jared from Subway, nearly five years after South Park's episode entitled, "Jared Has AIDS." (:28)

Blade's Trip to the Cardiologist (:30): Blade was told to store 24 hours' worth of his urine. Blade's Alien Ham story is the most popular WrestleCrap Radio segment.

Obscure Wrestling News (:35): New Jack has opened a wrestling school. Brooke Hogan is moving to LA to become the "next Paris Hilton," says mother Linda Hogan. Blade has a strange attraction to her. (:37)

Horsetrolla: The tail lifts and out comes a coiled paper. (:40) Sad News: Mickie James is no longer WWE Women's Champion. Blade loves Robecca, currently Batista's girl.

Wrestling Dream Analysis (:46): Blade might bang Linda Hogan if he was listening to this segment's background music. Lions make the playoffs and a crippled Jackie Gayda gives Blade a shout-out.

Mail Bag (:53): Do people have sex while listening to the show? Lou for Brou wants RD's opinion on great heels. Benjamin Bergman 'totally' listened to the progrem last week. (:57) Ric Flair would die before he could even think of retiring. [Or perhaps become a zombie and still keep wrestling - Future PB]

Mike Awesome died.

Seventeen Syllables All Grown Up WrestleMania Haiki:
WrestleMania.
All Grown Up, huh? Michael Jack-
son would not approve.

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• The Penguin to my Joker, Mr. Blade Braxton
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 1. Global Internet
• URLs not taken: 1. GuaranteedPoonTang.com
• SPEAKING OFs: 8. Being hetero and love and all kinds of things, anal fumes, which, Summer’s Eve, dropping the f-bomb, train wreck (2), tran-wreck
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
• Outdated references: 2. Burgess Meredith as The Penguin, The Gong Show
• I didn’t even know he was sick: 0.

 

• F-Bombs: 7. Blade
  

• Weird Al Laughs: 1
• RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 1
  
• WrestleCrap Gongs: 8
  

• Mickie James References: 5
• Ashley Massaro References: 2
  

• Mailbag
• Lou for Brou: Hey RD, I've read you reference the Mr. McMahon character as one of the top two or three all time greatest heels. Who else would you say would be in the top three? Just curious and I think a lot of your loyal crappers would be interested in knowing your opinion. Ric Flair. Bob Backlund.
  
• Benjamin Bergman: Totally listened to your show for the first time last week. It rules. Do you think that Ric Flair will wrestle till he dies in the ring? Ric Flair is starting to look like a carcass these days.
  

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Boba Foot reboot?
  WrestleMania.
  All Grown Up, huh? Michael Jack-
  son would not approve.

 

042 Fired by FaxTrolla: September 29, 2006

Fired by FaxTrolla
(61 minutes)

Blade has a question about Aquaman. RD has a phlegm disorder and is not in a good mood. Lord Alfred is asleep at the job. A new written feature on the site, Rewriting The Book, looks at 'what if?' wrestling scenarios. The Co-Hosts want you to watch Airplane! (:14)

RD's Trip to the Grocery (:15): Babies and animals are on the shrink-wrapped bag that holds your toilet paper even though they don't use it.

Obscure Wrestling News: Larry Zbysko is seeking to sell the rights to his biography for a movie. (:20) Rikishi was arrested by some US Marshals for not appearing in court for a hearing. RD and Trash Losagain will be at a Legends wrestling show in Kokomo. (:24) New Jack got into a fight at a concession stand due to someone mixing his drink. (:27)

Mail Bag (:35): Corey wonders on Russo's coming to TNA. Blade rambles. Bob thinks the Boogeyman should haunt TNA as the Closet Creature. Erik Majorwitz (2) still hasn't received Blade's prize. Blade makes excuses. (:40) M Lawson wants the Co-Hosts to have new nicknames. (:42)

Sad News: Trish was fired. (:43) RD sings and wants Blade to call him MC Scat Cat.

SMARTEST MAN IN WRESTLING

If Kevin Nash is ever hired by WWE again, RD will pronounce him the smartest man in wrestling. [WHELP, took him seven years.] On the other end of the scale, RD is amazed at how TNA makes some really stupid mistakes and is yet still around. (:47)

Kid Kash was fired. Justin Credible was fired via fax machine. (:51) RD suggests that Super Crazy get rid of his fax machine. Kurt Angle failed too many drug tests for the WWE, of all organizations, but TNA has hired him. RD dislikes that. (So I guess the honeymoon is over then?)

Seventeen Syllables of Kurt for you:
Six sides, one Angle.
Dixie forgot a ramp for
Kurt's future wheelchair.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• The Jana to my Zan, scratch that. The Zan to my Jana, Mr. Blade Braxton
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Global Internet, WCWA Legends Show
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 11. Liquid, liquids, the book, subscribing to a newsletter, Larry Zybiskso, being arrested, fellow crappers, uh, someone who will probably getting pregnant in the near future, sourpuss, harmful to your health
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
• Outdated references: 1. SuperFriends
• I didn’t even know he was sick: 1. Mr. Whipple

 

• RD Time Outs: 3
• Blade Time Outs: 2
  
• Krankor Laughs: 1
• Weird Al Laughs: 1
  
• RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  1

 

• Tammy Sytch References:  2
• Trish Stratus References:  4
  

 

• Mailbag
• Corey: Hey old buddy old pal RD Reynolds and Blade "Don't call me Brakestown" Braxton, my question is twofold. With the exciting announcement of Vince Russo coming to TNA to help punch up the creative aspect of the show, how do you think Impact will be changed? And after all the damage he's done to the two big federations, how do you suppose Vince Russo keeps convincing people that he's anything more than a bottomless money pit? So long and thanks for all the Krankor, Corey. Blade: Impact will smell like gasoline.
• Bob: Last week was a very sad week for a lot of Crappers especially myself, with WWE releasing one of my favorite wrestlers, the Boogeyman. And with Russo heading over to TNA I got to thinking: maybe he'd bring in the Boogeyman. So my question is if Russo brings in Boogeyman, could he use the name the Closet Creature? He would be the BooGayMan.
  
• Erik Majorwitz (2): Blade promised me a signed copy of Toxic Avenger. I still haven't received it. I've watched the Santa Claus Conquers the Martians DVD you sent me numerous times RD; thank you for your timely shipping. Perhaps I should contact John Thomas to get this matter sorted out. Erik is a great guy. [No argument there.] Blade makes excuses.
  
• M Lawson: Hello RD. My question for you is this: would you call yourself R2-D2 Reynolds for this week's radio show? Blade could be Blade Breakdance. No.
  

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: The ADA isn’t happy with TNA’s lack of accessibility.
  Six sides, one Angle.
  Dixie forgot a ramp for
  Kurt's future wheelchair.