281 Chicks With Chips: March 5, 2019

Oh, Hi Blade.

85 minutes

Blade is once again visiting RD at his home after more than 10 years. He is thankful he can be Jazz Overnight instead of using a "burner" phone. He still has a Big Announcement somewhere. He was in Chicago for Cory Udler's birthday, hence the subsequent visit.

The two plan to record another RD&BS immediately after; in following their desire for user participation they will follow one's request by going over an old show. (:05)

Blade got lost in this very site while recently browsing it. I cannot blame him, this place is VERY extensive. (:09)

Blade went by himself to a ghetto gas station in Philadelphia. (:10) He bought their local Homegirls (Sweeties flavor) potato chips which confuses him for some reason. They turn out as sweet as the packaging. Their brother brand, Chumpies, are also sweet, albeit less so.

RD has a stroopwafel from his Dutch grocery. Blade becomes nostalgic when eating it which fills his head as he doesn't have any words. "It's...different." Then: "it's very good." RD has to explain to him what a stroopwafel is including the Wikipedia mentioned custom of placing one over a cup of coffee to loosen the syrup inside. Unfortunately, he only has Diet Mountain Lightning at the moment, which is not good hot OR cold.

RD has polished his Faxtrolla. (:22) Woman Gorgeous George has pickles which sounds like something Man Gorgeous George would have had (while he was alive of course). The Co-Fruitcakes silent interactive a video on her Facebook page about George Frankenstein's Dill With It Pickles. Blade decides to buy some. RD abstains, as he is not a big pickle man. Ahem.

Blade: "Do you like soap?"

RD is speechless. (:28)

This is supposedly a segue to Hollywood making organic soap to sell on Etsy. Blade is confused by some of the flavors. He still has his Rock talking soap, which has a better shelf life and audience than Francine's fetish used soap.

As mentioned before in exasperation, Tam was arrested. (:34) The difference this time is that there was actually an article on WWE (you know things are bad when they have something!) which Blade reads as he calls himself a "talent-less drunk". That implies he had talent in the first place. Like me RD is (still) speechless that she's still out and about afterwards her SIXTH drunk driving incident (after "video conferencing" with a judge to make things even more absurd.)

Blade recounts how he got a DWI on his 18th birthday (but not for being underage) which put him on the straight and narrow to drink at home nowadays. Good man. It is frightening that he has his head on straighter than (the older) Tam.

Maryse is expecting her second child. (:40)

As mentioned earlier Blade was in Chicago to see Cory for his birthday, and KISS (not for their birthday). (:43) For some reason (drinking at home perhaps?) he randomly did Nintendo John for a change (though Blade with that different than usual audio setup sounded like he had aged into Cranky Kong), alongside his friend's Honky Tonk Mailman (thankyouverymuch) and Gene and Paul, the latter two being visited at a eerily silent "backstage". Apparently Madison Rayne is returning. Blade laughs loudly throughout. Shockingly the HTMM does not provide any stamp news.

Corey Strode (not on Patreon) asks a question about WOW. (:56) RD guesses Blade would prefer Russo WCW. Surprisingly however, he instead prefers 1988 WWF. Santana Garrett of current WOW debuted in a show with Blade - I mean the Midnight Rose. Like him I mix those two up also. Also it's his 10th anniversary. Rose, not Blade. Like me I don't think he's reached 5 years of maturity yet.

Ed Leslie, of all people, is entering the Hall of Fame. (:60) The Fruitcakes wonder who else should be inducted. This is not a repeat from last year when they also did this, which is itself not a repeat from the month before that when they also did this. (:71)

Blade wants the Midnight Express post-roster change, Miss Elizabeth and her granny panties, and Demolition. RD wants Jim Cornette, the British Bulldogs, and the Goobledy Gooker, of course.

Blade never had a problem with Roman Reigns. (:73) Big Dave Bistro has also returned. Sources are having Kofi Kingston against Daniel Bryan at Wrestlemania. Blade finally has his own Becky Lynch doll, who RD now considers his favorite female wrestler ever after her master trolling online [What? There's no mention of The Room's Tommy Wiseau wanting to be special guest ring announcer at Wrestlemania 35? You're Tearing Me Apart, R.D.! -RVM Kai].

Seventeen Syllables to say about that:
Becky with a dick.
Russo bomb at Mania:
Penis on a pole.



$31.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right



Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• Blade in studio
  
• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 4. Patreon, WrestleCrap.com, WrestleCrapRadio.com, Baskin Robbins
  
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 0.
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.

 

• Phone Calls & Run Ins: 4. Honky Tonk Mailman, Nintendo John, Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley from Kiss

 

• Blade Time Outs:  3 (1 Real Quick)
• RD Time Outs: 1
  
• Mama’s Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes:  2
  
• RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  1
• WrestleCrap Gongs:  1
• Nintendo 8 Bit Pops:  5

 

• Question of the Week from: Corey Strode
• Women of Wrestling, great promotion or the greatest promotion? Neither, 1988 WWF.

 

• WrestleCrap 3 Count:  What 3 candidates would you want in the WWE Hall of Fame?
• RD:  Jim Cornette, British Bulldogs, the Gobbledy Gooker
• Blade:  Demolition, Miss Elizabeth, Midnight Express (Bobby Eaton and Stan Lane)

 

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: For whom the ginger troll tolls:
  Becky with a dick.
  Russo bomb at Mania:
  Penis on a pole.

261 Ron: Legacy: August 6, 2016

Owww!!!

109 minutes

RD got another episode recorded just so he can talk about jobbers (of the week) returning on air in actual WWE rings. Blade wants to say something but can't.

RD: "It's always good whenever you say 'I can't say it.'"

This radio progrem will soon be 11 years old. RD compares it to a prison sentence.

Blade: "You know a lot of shows do really hit their stride in that 11th year, you know what I mean?"

Blade thinks the new Raw logo spells Ron. RD plays one of Ron Simmons' old WCW theme songs in response (which admittedly is a...damn good tune).

Blade threatens his Big Announcement yet again. (:08)

The Duo remember the TNA correspondents they've suffered through over the years.

Fellow Chris Dietrich sponsors the progrem with some sort of Nintendo ROM of his of Basic Championship Wrestling. Sadly neither Nintendo John nor his audience make a run-in. (:14)

Adam Frasier of Strange Kids Club interviewed Blade about wrestling. "I sound like a very intelligent man," he lies.

RD has also been writing a column once again, this time for WhatCulture.

It was Blade's turn to TRIP to the Grocery while RD sits at home in his air conditioned room sipping water. (:23) Although he didn't go to a grocery but to a corner store  (not to be confused with a coroner store or Blade's random Paul Bearer "impression"). There he found (still fresh?!?!?!) Rap Snacks, which had been discussed on the progrem a while back. As he reads the synopsis, Iggy and later me had written that back then he didn't like them. Now after trying a few he changes his opinion and thinks of them more favorably, which is good! To balance that, RD checks their site and is confounded by how "terrible" it is.

:32 The MovieTrolla still works after all this time. So I guess there's no need to send a (free) replacement just yet.

WWE is doing another animated movie with Scooby-Doo because the first one was a success...I think? Also Dusty Rhodes is in it for some reason. RD compares him to Bela Lugosi in an Ed Wood film.

RD remembered when he wrote about their Flintstones crossover which was pretty bad, Office Space reference notwithstanding.

In an attempt to "put himself over" Blade managed to get Don out of movie retirement to star in a horror movie thing with him.

Johnny Nitro/John Morrison is to star in a...Sinbad movie? Huh. (:42) This can play out in one of three ways:

• My way: He's going to play the traditional heroic character - who is of course Arab. What, whitewashing in Hollywood? Get out of here! And yes, I know they did that with an animated version with Brad Pitt as the legendary sailor. The fact that nobody remembers let alone talks about it shows how successful it was, and how this will be. Hell, just finding its page I found another newer one featuring Patrick Stewart - the real thespian, not our TNA man who enjoys leaving now.
• Blade's way: He's going to do his best Lou Ferrigno impression. That movie was so awesome in its badness, I'm amazed it hasn't seen more play let alone a RiffTrax/MSTing or two. A remake of that in the same so bad it's good vein? License to print money. 
• RD's way: He's going to be portraying the COMEDIAN Sinbad. I'd pay all the money in the world to see that, just so long as it's not Jingle All The Way 3.

This of course leads into another Star Wars debate meandering which almost makes RD lose his cool. (:45) Perhaps Sinbad will make a cameo in Episode VIII.

Blade's friend and Troma Films comrade Catherine Corcoran was in a horror movie project (100 Acres Of Hell, not to be confused with the Hundred Acre Wood as RD first thinks) with Gene "Boba Foot" Snitsky. Thankfully before Blade can continue his analogy of how "his inbox exploded" they get her on to talk to her about the experience. (:48 - :66) She had a good time with the shooting and with Gene, although she did not test to see if he still had his foot fetish. As for cereals she loves Reese's Puffs and their new slogan "That is the shit!"

Blade's new TNA "correspondents" call, and the man who was formerly the Honky Tonk Mail Man pulls double duty (though not both at the same time) as...Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley. What, was David Lee Roth busy? ("NO!")  (:68)

This whole nonsense makes more...sense, if you keep the following in mind:

• Things can't get more bizarre with TNA than having the Hardy's fight because TNA is having serious money issues and needed the material no matter how bizarre it was.
• Blade and some friends were going to see Kiss perform live in concert, and were even on the way while the duo were recording their radio progrem. Hence the band would more than not be on their minds to use for "comedy" in the loosest sense of the word. 
• Blade's confederate probably chose those two because he could do those voices at least. I don't know how he would do Billy Gibbons for instance.
• Blade is in the midst of a mid-life crisis and wants to (still) rock and roll all night and party every day like he used to when he was younger.
• Blade and Don were in that recent movie with someone as the Kiss Demon. (It wasn't Dale Torberg though sadly.)
• Both Gene and Paul were in the news recently discussing how Kiss would still carry on without them, causing much debate and argument.
• Kiss did some concert thing for WCW that wasted money for low ratings, a symbol of the similar downfall TNA has been experiencing for the last twenty or so years.
• No mention is made about TNA, as is the expected custom.
• "Our" Gene is a much more pleasant character to hear than the current Ted Nugent-lite caricature we have currently. Wow, yet another like that? What a shock. I look forward to Viewing Booth Bill Cosby being his TNA successor.
• Paul was once seen with a dissatisfied look on his face at a Raw taping.

I know I'm probably reading too much into this but hey - it's what I do, and I do it best.

While RD once again has to suffer another Tammy update this time the news is surprisingly good (for a change and while it lasts); she has been out of rehab and sober for 138 days as of this radio progremming. May she keep that way, in all seriousness. (:81)

Blade's Misfits singing gets gonged.

A Mike with a weird last name that makes me fearful on spelling it wrong, tongue twists Blade, and makes RD reference the recently deceased Peter Shaffer has this week's Question about Matt Hardy and his dilapidated boat. (:85) RD wants him to next hide behind the (dilapidated) Smackdown Fist.

Blade's further Star Wars debating gets temporarily silenced by the power of the Force.

:90 Did Blade ever tell Mike Check about the time he finally figured out how to properly use his bumper stickers? (It's also nice of him to call in without the phone ringing. Perhaps RD once again put his phone on silent.) While Mike was at Raleigh, NC's 92.7 WROL "The Roll" as Big Fred Fingers he tried supporting the (bad) minor league team there by not shaving and calling it "No Trim Till Redbirds Win". His show was titled the equally bad "Raleigh Fingers Afternoon Mustache Ride". He plays some John Anderson, the country musician, not to be confused with JON Anderson, of Brit prog rock icons Yes.

Braun Strowman's new gimmick seems to be as a fighter of jobbers - sorry, I mean "local competitors". What next, are they going to start calling wrestlers "sports entertainers"? (:100)

RD wonders which will show up first next vernal equinox: Blade's Big Announcement, his next Jobber of the Week, or that Parts Unknown Yearbook he keeps talking about.

Time to put this show to bed:
James Ellsworth on Raw.
A "local competitor".
Jobber of the year.



$28.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right 

 

 

 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

• WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 4. WrestleCrapRadio.com, Basic Championship Wrestling NES Game, StrangeKids Magazine, What Culture Wrestling magazine, Drive In Movie Maniacs
• URLs not taken: 0.
• SPEAKING OFs: 4. Magazines, nostalgic, movies, derailing the show
• Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.

 

• Phone Calls & Run Ins: 3. Catherine Corcoran, Gene Simmons, Paul Stanley

 

• Blade Time Outs: 3 (2 Real Quick)
  
• RD Time Outs: 2 (1 Real Quick, 1 Wait a Minute)
• Krankor Laughs: 1
  
• RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  1
• Weird Al Laughs:  1
• WrestleCrap Gongs: 1
• RD False Finishes: 1
  

• Mike Check Radio Row: 
• Station/Market:  92.7  WROL “ The Roll” (Raleigh, North Carolina)
• Radio Call Sign:  Big Fred Fingers
• Show:  Raleigh Fingers Afternoon Mustache Ride
• Promotion: No Trim Till Redbirds Win
• Song:  Justa Swingin’ by Jon Anderson
  

 

• Question of the Week from: Mike
• What would dilapidated item do you Matt Hardy to hide behind next? The Smackdown Fist (RD) or my old backyard swing set (Blade)

 

• Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Jobbers are back and Blade is smitten:
  James Ellsworth on Raw.
  A "local competitor".
  Jobber of the year.

 

 

Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley

You wanted the worst, you got the worst! On August 6, 2016 (episode #261) RD and Blade reinstated Wrestlecrap Radio's TNA Correspondent position and gave the gig to KISS band members Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley.

They made two appearances. 

 

Despite this they were the longest tenured at 1703 days.

 

Like their predecessor the Honky Tonk Mail Man they survived through the show ending, in this case with Blade's death.