RD wanted to wait things out for a few days due to current events. That took longer than expected.
Then Blade got a brutal ear infection. That didn't help either.
Driven to the brink and at the last minute, they decide to cut their losses and record now. It technically still counts as June, right?
According to their (barnyard) logic, if King Kong Bundy always insisted on a 5-count for his matches, then Hulk Hogan should have always kicked out at 4.
Blade has a habit of bowling with smoke bombs on July 4th. (:08) RD: "Thanks for explaining how the calendar works."
Thus, today's pressed for time radio progrem consists of the two just going through eBay auctions (keyword 'wcw'). (:14) Blade wants to search by proximity for some reason despite being in no condition to perform.
Blade: Three Sting figures for $38.50 (all prices are USD).
A 1999 DDP with magnetic grip.
RD: An 8 inch 1997 Sting.
Random computer games including WCW Nitro and something called "Airplanes" which is actually a demo disc for Wings of Glory (produced by Warren Spector!). RD rightfully calls it a ripoff.
Blade: A $10 Goldberg VHS tape.
RD: 61 figures for $195.
53 figures with DVDs (do any of them contain Goldberg?)
A $98 1993 Sid Vicious figure. A "mountain of muscle" with half the brain that you do.
Blade: A figure of Jimmy Hart in a yellow suit masquerading as Hulk Hogan.
A vibrating Scott Hall figure infested with fleas.
RD: 10 miles from his house (but with free shipping): A rain-covered baby carrier.
VHS tapes for $45.
A tape of Wrestlewar '89 for $19.
Blade: 30 miles from his trailer: Brian Pillman and Chris Benoit masquerading as D-X.
More vibrating figures of Andre the Giant and Kevin Nash.
A "loose" Fabulous Moolah (but does she vibrate?).
Blade: 50 miles from his trailer: A Fall Brawl / WarGames 1995 Snapback hat for the low low price of $130.
"Sold Cut" Kevin Nash (no word on if he's portrayed by a fake Diesel).
RD found a seller of autographed cards. He makes Blade guess some of their prices (for 2014). Stan Lane: $17. Kevin von Erich: $35. Booker T: $9. Eric Bischoff: $20. "James E. Cornette": $38 (Does not come with sexual harassment as illustrated). Terri Runnels: $20 (Does not come with handgun or scam house as illustrated). A Konnan scribble: $11. Dennis Condrey: "only" $9. A Ryan Shamrock illustration where Blade thinks her nose is too unhealthily red: $20.
The two then go international. Blade will search by highest price first, RD by lowest.
Blade: $12000 for a "bundle" of video wrestling footage.
$8000 for a sealed VHS "private collection". Includes a German version of Road Wild '96, or as they call it, "Wild in Sturgis '96". RD sneezes as his bid.
$7500 1995 WCW Main event Nasty Boys rookie card.
RD: 99¢ Hollywood & Vine as Steve Austin. He wants to put that on one of his coasters.
$1.69 1999 Brian Knobbs card.
Blade: $5500 WrestleMania 6 Bobby Heenan Jacket.
$5000 GEM-MT 10 Kimberly Page rookie card.
Since they're on the subject, the two then look for Tam stuff (to have fun with).
Blade: $1500 for a "superstars 1 of 100" figure. This is the highest priced.
The next item is $800 (also a superstars figure).
Then $500 (ditto).
Then $320 for a WWF 1998 Calendar CD that Blade already has.
Then $130 for a "Sunny & Sid Ahmed Johnson Signed WWF WWE 1997 Bend-Ems Action Figure Set".
RD: There is no Sunny within 95 miles of his house (thankfully). 165 miles from his house: A 1998 "Get Pumped" Deadstock shirt for $200.
A 1996 Sunny Days print ad for a life management program for $2.30. RD: "I don't want her in charge of anything."
A $5 Sunny in Chains photo from Australia.
A 1996 Sunny Daze Collection print ad for $8.
A completed listing from Fort Mitchell, Kentucky for an "Absolutely Sunny" shirt. Sold on the 13th for $50 despite the lack of a chin.
Blade: "Pretend I'm your father."
RD does the Haiku since Blade is still in no condition to perform:
What a show this was.
To be honest, was not bad.
Was fun till Sunny.
$32.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. Patreon, wrestlecrapradio.com, What Ganon Is Up To
URLs not taken: 1. Smokebombbowling.com
SPEAKING OFs: 0.
Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
Blade’s Poor Performance Excuse: Worst ear infection of all time.
Phone Calls & Run Ins: 0.
Mama’s Broken Damn, Damn, Damn Dishes: 3
Blade Time Outs: 4 (1 Real Quick)
RD Time Outs: 1 (Wait a second)
Krankor Laughs: 1
RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 2
Weird Al Laughs: 1
Cricket Chirps: 1
Question of the Week from: N/A
WrestleCrap 3 Count: N/A
Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Under the weather Blade reaches to RD for the hot tag on the haiku this week:
What a show this was.
To be honest, was not bad.
Was fun till Sunny.
Bitey tries his claw hosting with predictable resultsRandom albeit looped/sequential bird soundclips take over for RD & BladeRD plays all his soundclips available to himRD attempts an avant-garde meditative audio piece RD last minute submits his monthly quota for the peanut gallery. Co-Hosss Contest Year 14: An owl and a droid imitating parrot fail to impress with their own soundclips. Current Tally: 0 of ???.
What's up my people, Raging_Demons here. It is that time folks! The return of The Gooker! It's the award from Wrestlecrap as voted on by us on who is the worst in the year in wrestling.
This year in 2019 let me say: WOW was there a lot of crap! So naturally let me explain the term "ForceRise". On social media I do admit I tend to watch some foreign programming. Currently I'm watching a program from Japan called "Kamen Rider Zero-One". Now the villains will basically transform a.k.a "morph" like the Power Rangers, the belt that they use says "ForceRise!" like so:
After thinking about it for awhile the word "ForceRise" kind of made sense for this year's Gooker. As in "This crap on my screen will FORCE me from my couch and RISE up from it to change the channel now!"
[Insert your own rimshot here. Preferably while voting.]
This year's selection is a mixed bag. We got people returning for a historic second win, we have newcomers getting their first nominations, and a possible historic nominee!
So let's look into the 2019 Gooker nominees!
And they are...
1. Baron Corbin's Push From Hell: For first timers on the site let me give you the definition of a "Push From Hell" is. A "Push From Hell" can be defined as when a promotion gives a wrestler major hype, and possibly major career hype, to make the wrestler look awesome, but they keep continuing the push to the point of ad nauseam. This Push from Hell goes to someone that doesn't even deserve it at all going to, of all people...Baron Corbin!
Personally, Baron Corbin is the most boring person on the roster. He does a promo in such a monotone voice it drives people to sleep. He says a promo like he's reading it out of a book. Hell, he does his promo like if he's doing an elementary book report; boring, slow, and lacking appeal. His wrestling puts people to sleep. Baron Corbin is essentially a human Jigglypuff. #BaronCorbinIsAHumanJigglypuff [I bet that .com is not taken either.]
So why would WWE, of all the pro wrestling organizations out there, decided to give Baron Corbin, of all people, a Push from Hell? For the dumbest reason ever! WWE thinks that Baron Corbin...is attractive to women.
I would use a pic of Baron Corbin and ask you all if you think he's attractive, but I'm afraid to do so because I think putting a pic of Baron Corbin up would shut this site down due to the sheer lack of interest and how boring he is. Seriously if I put a pic up, the servers will systematically shut down and go to sleep, that's how boring he is!
Now to make matters worse Corbin received an infamous "King" gimmick, for winning this year's King Of The Ring. The title gimmick can be crappy depending on who it is that has it. For example: King Haku: Great but does not come with crown as illustrated. King Hacksaw Jim Duggan: not so much. Currently, King Baron Corbin had a craptastic moment by pouring dog food all over Roman Reigns. Not only was it made cringeworthy, but it had fans turning off their TV while taking to Social Media that they wanted this for a Gooker. [If not asleep that is.]
2. Shorty G: Chad Gable, an Olympic wrestler who competed in the 2012 London Summer Olympics, signed up with WWE and became on of a great tag-team known as "American Alpha" with his partner, Gooker nominee Jason "I'm Kurt Angle's son" Jordan. Both of them had great success as a team. UNFORTUNATELY, WWE hates Tag Teams because they want to push INDIVIDUALS. So WWE broke the team up.
While Jason went off to embrace his "Dad", Chad just became...nothing. That is until his royal boringness King Baron Corbin showed up and gave him a new nickname: Shorty Gable, or Shorty G. See? Baron Corbin's boringness is contagious! He bored the career death of Chad Gable! #BaronCorbinIsAHumanJigglypuff
3. Crown Jewel 2019: Last year's Gooker returns in an attempt to be the first ever back-to-back Gooker winner. Admittedly this year's Crown Jewel was considered to be better than last year. However, what makes it a Gooker nominee this time was behind-the-scenes drama. The "story" has it that Vinnie Mac pulled the live feed because the current leader of the country, Mohammad bin Salman, has not paid WWE for their previous live events. Everything was resolved let's move on.
Or not! The "story" then continues that most of the WWE stars were held because of MBS while other people in private jets like Brock Lesnar, Hulk Hogan and Vince McMahon took off leaving the other talent stranded. Of course I said "story" because there was another side to it claiming all of that never happened and it was just a technical issue. It was never proven which side was correct or not because none of the WWE talent never said anything about it, except for Karl Anderson's wife who said on Twitter that he will never be coming back to Saudi Arabia. Anyways. Whichever is the right side or not caused a mass delay for the following Smackdown.
4. WWE2K20: A first time a video game is nominated. WWE decided that this time they decided to go with a different video game publisher to make their video games and what they got was the stuff of broken video game legends. Currently this game is being compared to another bad game, Fallout 76, as the worst video game of all time! Social Media wise there were GIFs and pics that were spread all over about the game's constant bugs and botches. As proof, my saved pic of the game's Becky Lynch, seen here trying to be the female Fiend:
That is basically how bad the game is. Screwed up bugs, crappy scripting, and more that I couldn't even tell you what was going on because I don't have the knowledge of the video game business, but I do know someone that does! YoutuberMatt McMuscles provided a complete detail of how this game could become a potential Gooker winner:
[As someone with said aforementioned knowledge of the video game business - at least in the present day anyway - this one gets my vote. There's a reason games usually voted on as the awfullest or worst of their year often get a lot of coverage due to their notoriety. Usually this also includes the shenanigans encountered in making the game as bad as it is. This is something ridiculously evident here in droves, staring with the switch to a new developer with little experience on the series, which is itself deeply stagnated in look and game play. Wow, art imitating life here eh.
From there things compounded and kept growing. People who may not have been aware of what was being shared online may have finally noticed when supposed 'signed' special editions shipped without autographed photos. If you got the game running past the bugs morphing the characters into monsters if not acting possessed, you get environments and settings looking 20 years out of date, to the point where the new year made it literally unplayable.
...Although now I'm fearful that I've gone and done it yet again. If 2K makes DLC where you fight as an anthropomorphized animal, you'll know where they got that idea from.
Sorry about that.
On the other hand either one could create JigglyKing Corbin that the Rage is all the rage about. Silver lining?
#BaronCorbinIsAHumanJigglypuff]
5. The Fall of Ring Of Honor: In the 20 years that WrestleCrap and The Gooker have been around this is the FIRST time that Ring of Honor has received a nomination. This is especially damning considering that TNA/Impact hasn't had one in the past two years. That is awfully terrifying.
ROH has always had some shrapnel to it in recent years since their major broadcasting partner, Sinclair Broadcasting, had been linked to pro-right news manipulation like Fox News. This particular story however began in December 2018, when most of their major stars including The Young Bucks and So Cal Uncensored, left the company, leaving behind...not a whole lot of stars. There was Marty Scurll and...I think that's it? As attendance continues to reduce drastically their problems continue to get worse. Joey Mercury, who used to work with ROH as an agent, told some horrible stories on Social Media, like the awful treatment of wrestlers and even their business partner at the time New Japan. There are now people wondering if The Ratings Reaper will be claiming Ring Of Honor now instead of Impact. [That depends on how drunk Blade is currently.]
6. The Librarians: So what happened to The Young Bucks? Well in 2019 they, along with Cody Rhodes, Kenny Omega, and NFL Executive of the Jacksonville Jaguars Tony Khan went to create a new pro wrestling organization: All Elite Wrestling. In their short time, AEW has created some potential nominees like The Nightmare Collective (Cody's wife, Brandi Rhodes, creates a women's stable with Awesome Kong with it and they cut off the hair of defeated opponents for no good reason), The Dark Order (A cult-like stable whose followers were described by one Facebook poster as "failed gimps from Pulp Fiction" where they got noticed due to this), and AEW Dark's rotating color commentary seat (Seriously just listen and watch to the episodes Arn Anderson & Dustin Rhodes did; while Arn was bad in a boring way, Dustin became the new Art O'Donnell with saying in every other sentence "I want to go to the Private Party").
Out of all of them though the one that became a Gooker nominee were The Librarians. They didn't start on AEW, but on The Young Bucks popular Youtube vlog "Being The Elite". There The Bucks admitted that they "had to" create a librarian character and they both knew that the character was rather pointless. When you admit that your character sucks already then it does not bode well for them. The Bucks even did an internet contest with wrestlers submitting online videos to promote themselves why they wanted to be The Librarian. I said Librarian singular, because at the time there was supposed to be only one librarian character. In the end they chose two people as The Librarian. One was Leva Bates, who was widely known as an indie women's wrestlers known for her cosplay hobby and her appearances in NXT as..."Blue Pants Girl". (*sigh* I hate that name.) The other was an unknown NWA wrestler (way before NWA came back with "NWA Powerrr") named Peter Avalon, who was best known for being a pile of cheat heat-getting and wrestling sucking, among other failings. (That could be my opinion on Peter Avalon though I'm not quite sure about that.) Thus, one became two.
The Librarians are basically jobbers to the stars but in my opinion, I don't think they deserve a Gooker. Avalon being a cheap Barry Horowitz wannabe makes it definitely deserve it just for himself, but Bates brought some good entertainment on the side of things that redeems it.
[Note that they are not to be confused with the Co-Librarians of this fine site. Not unless Ms. Bates gets in touch with us. This is assuming I remember what our contact location is at. Perhaps, if she is reading this, she can let us know somehow.]
7. The 2019 WWE Draft: WWE couldn't keep Smackdown on USA Network any longer so they shopped around and...Fox Sports was the winner?! So they did the Draft which included the stupid "Wildcard Rule" and the humorous picture of a meeting room filled with people including, of all things, the mascot for Fox's NFL programming.
8. Bray Wyatt vs. Seth Rollins at Hell In A Cell: Let's get this out of the way. Seth Rollins had an awful 2019. In that year he did weird AF toy commercials, his girlfriend Becky Lynch outed their relationship to the world to use it as ammunition in a Twitter feud with Edge, he was embarrassed by The Kliq, Brock Lesnar beat the respect and manhood out of him, and he had a feud with Bray Wyatt.
Bray has been a recent magnet to all things Gooker but it looked like he made it clear with his new gimmick in the "Firefly Fun House". Unfortunately for Rollins it made him look bad. Bray's new "alter ego" as "The Fiend" not only made Rollins look like he wet his pants in one encounter but their Hell In A Cell match was...ugh! The match was covered in The Fiend's signature red lighting, good for creating terror but not good in a wrestling match. The ending of that match was very controversial. While The Fiend used a Harley Quinn-esque, cartoon sized, giant hammer to hurt Rollins, Rollins got...Triple H's best buddy in the whole wide world, MR. SLEDGEHAMMER! In that moment the referee rang the bell to end the match...which was No DQ.
Needless to say the fans were pissed off! I personally think Triple H had his heart broken when he saw Mr. Sledgehammer so he called the match to end. It took them two days to figure out an explanation to that match. TWO DAYS!
9. The Bennett's Pregnancy Mess: So real-life married couple Mike and Maria Kanellis-Bennett had re-signed their WWE contracts, giving them a storyline to reflect on Maria's status of being pregnant with Mike's baby. Which is...that the baby isn't Mike's and he's a limp-dick loser? Huh? Then The Bennetts got removed from TV due to her pregnancy followed by Mike claiming he wants out of his WWE contract? Wha...? If "rumors" are true then their actual story had been transferred to...
10: The Lana/Rusev Love Triangle of Eternal Torment 2: Lashley Fever: Guess who's back? Lana and her hubby Rusev, that's who! The previous 2015 Gooker winners of a love triangle with Dolph Ziggler are doing another love triangle with...Bobby Lashley? Uh...Yeah. Long story short, Lana accuses Rusev of being a no-diddly good cheater and a sex addict and wants some of Lashley's BBC. So Lana wants a WWE divorce just before revealing Lashley made her pregnant.
The divorce happens and Lana overacts terribly. She overacts so much she's actually butt-hurt over the complaints she received on Social Media. Yes, it does gets worse from here. Now Lana and Lashley are getting married in the worst WWE wedding ever! Just how bad was it? Well after couple of wedding interruptions, Liv Morgan came back saying she was in lesbians with Lana! Now where have I seen that before? Hrm... Nope! No idea.
Oh by the way, RVM Kai mentioned to me that he hoped when Liv Morgan returns he hopes she doesn't end up like Emmalina. Too late.
Then Rusev pops out of a cake, no seriously he does, and goes a-squashing. By the way, this is still ongoing AND it was rumored to be for Mike and Maria Bennett before they left TV. Did they dodge a bullet on that one or what?!
This is my choice for Gooker and the odds-on favorite. Also this is being heavily criticized not by us the pro wrestling fans, but by EVERYONE! This Gooker nomination has gone plaid! Even CM Punk took his complaint to Twitter saying WWE needed to hire an LGBTQ-sensitive writer. [I'm worried Vince would read that as BBQ writer and perhaps try to hire back JR.] If this wins it will be historic. It will make Lana and Rusev 2-time Gooker winners, which will tie with Hornswoggle, but it will make the first-ever winners to win WITH THE SAME STORYLINE of Love Triangles that never, ever stop causing us eternal torment!!! Make it stop, please!
You've got until January 11th to vote for what was the worst of them all. So go ahead and vote!
RD: "Is every show we ever do like some kind of, you know, event? Some kind of milestone?"
...
RD: "It's been almost 20 years since you actually wrote anything on the site."
Drunk Blade wants a Male-Male-Male threesome.
RD compliments the very site you are reading. "They are fantastic people, they do fantastic work." (:12) Acting oppositely from his co-host, Drunk Blade had to deter a co-worker from becoming a 13th Listener.
RD offers Drunk Blade cinnamon apple straws, a variation of veggie straws. He likes them and its malic acid, the term that Blade would want as another indie wrestler persona (although it would fit better as a finisher in my opinion). (:15)
RD reminds people he once managed Mark Henry when he fought The Big Show, who is getting a Netflix comedy series (which is probably not this one). [Aaaaaand it's gone. Did WWE Films have a hand in it? - Erik Majorwitz] RD thinks he could play a neighbor teacher. Drunk Blade: "You could have thrown away a WWE career." (:21) Blade now has to avoid people due to his WC work, or something. His phone responds by avoiding him temporarily.
C.M. Punk is getting some sort of tryout on some show or other which might see his return to WWE. B.M. Punk disapproves. RD gives him one (log) line. (:32) Recovering Mickie James may do commentary on Main Event. Drunk Blade remains confused drunk.
Who else would they want to see return to commentate? (:35) RD wants Ernie Lad, Howard Finkel, and yelling Brian Knobbs. Drunk Blade can't count, but he wants (Satanic) Superstar Billy Graham, Susan St. James, the Black Scorpion (where would he have space for his magic tricks?), and Demolition Axe.
This week, RD reads the "You Asked Us!" column in The Wrestler Magazine June 1989 (:44). "Mat Reporter" Lori Long of Edmonton writes to the "British Bulldogs" to inquire about Matilda's condition. Drunk Blade thinks the tag team nursed her. I'm just glad none of his exes had a pet dog for him to try this out personally.
Paul O'Parka of Facebook (2) asks about reviving cereals. (:49) RD wants the return of Vanilla Captain Crunch which lasted three months in the 70s. Blade remembers Strawberry Shortcake (not Crunch?) cereal, but he wants ET cereal since they tasted like a woman or something. One wonders where he ate that cereal from.
WWE will have pyrotechnics again. Drunk Blade thinks they once killed someone, but sadly does not add that information onto a Wikipedia page. (:54)
Televised wrestling will be literally weekly, even before including indies and PPVs and whatever Impact is currently doing. Blade fears for his partner's health in following it all, rather than just reading summaries of them online like just about everyone else except him (all that daytime work while sober probably prevents him from being online too much, understandably).
Blade still uses a VCR to record wrestling in 2019?
Seventeen Syllables:
Way too much wrestling.
All of these shows. Gentlemen,
Start your VCRs.
$31.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Patreon, wrestlecrapradio.com
URLs not taken: 1. Girdlegauze.com
SPEAKING OFs: 3. Obscure things such as this, indy workers, my in ring career
Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
Phone Calls & Run Ins: 2. B.M. Punk, Bill Apter
Blade Time Outs: 9 (1 Wait a Second, 3 Real Quick)
RD Time Outs: 2 (1 Wait a Minute, 1 Real Quick)
Krankor Laughs: 1
Mama's Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes: 4
Cricket Chirps: 6
RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 1
Weird Al Laughs: 1
WrestleCrap Gongs: 2
Question of the Week from: Paul O'Parka (2)
What cereal would you bring back from the dead? RD: Vanilla Captain Crunch. Blade: ET Cereal.
WrestleCrap 3 Count: Top 3 commentators.
RD: Brian Knobbs, Howard Finkel, "Big Cat" Ernie Ladd (non sequential)
Blade: Demoliton Ax, Black Scorpion, Susan St. James (replaces “Superstar” Billy Graham) [He uttered brother XX times at Summerslam 1988.]
Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: T120 can hold all that wrestling?
Way too much wrestling.
All of these shows. Gentlemen,
Start your VCRs.
Blade is still with RD at his home following the earlier recording of the standard radio progrem. His Jazz Overnight sounds very sleepy now though. He entertains the people about how he can't remember most of their old episodes, unsurprisingly. However at least he's not drinking right now. Small steps and all.
Since RD has been encouraging listener participation for this show's incarnation, Zap Fabian suggested reviewing an old episode (:04). So RD takes a look at the pilot, all the way back in August 2005. (:07)
The audio quality remains in high phone-buzzing over-modulated fidelity.
"You know."
The progrem was originally started before their appearance on Get In The Ring Radio...which they killed off, sending the original podcasters off the Internet.
RD sure talked a lot back then, at least compared to "greenhorn" Blade and in talking about WC.
Someone reviewing it at the time thought of it as a "17 minute voice IM. " (:17)
RD links current Sunny to Maude back then. This gives Blade a coughing fit. I hope he doesn't cough straight into RD's microphone.
The Once and Future Bea
RD forgot who Clumsy Girl was. Don't feel too bad, I forgot too.
Neither likes how they sounded then. (:13)
RD still doesn't watch much of Raw.
Young RD had a Tivo from 2003.
Blade was partying hard at Young RD's age of 36.
Tim Conway and Tom Wopat are still alive...for now.
RD wants to ask people about Dorff. (:17)
Young RD: "How did we get on Don Knotts?" RD: "That's a question you'll ask a lot, RD."
Kerwin White was discussed a lot, for obvious reasons. (:21)
So too the Boogeyman.
Revenge of the Nerds came out in 1984.
The two are not used to their old voices talking about Gooker nominees in August. (:26)
RD was sad he didn't make a Heidenrich Energy quip. "I'm really confused...What is wrong with you, young RD?"
RD is surprised Blade did not make a trashbag reference. (:28)
Blade wants to makeup haiku for the episode, though oddly he doesn't do so here now. RD is surprised people still wanted to listen after, or paid to listen after, either then or now. I believe Vince says the same thing of his own product every day instead of relating to the middle class.
75 minutes
((( recorded in left audio channel only fidelity )))
Blade ambushes RD with Tammy news. Hey, at least they're talking about wrestling! (From sources telling Blade following her on her Facebook page.) Sometime after Christmas she said she was looking for a wedding ring. RD is at least happy they talk about her earlier in the show anyway. She has had a month to make things happen after all.
[It should be noted by the way that this and Tammy's other posts are all set to FB friend visibility only. This means that ideally these updates are only meant for a limited audience and not intended for the whole world to see/hear and laugh at. Especially if they are shared by a (sometimes inebriated) bachelor in his mid 40s who keeps confusing himself with his masked and suited alter ego. So essentially Blade is giving away private stuff here no matter how private it may be. This, I admit, is poor form. Watching a train wreck may be fun as long as you're not inside it, but when it's in a closed area instead of an outdoor showing, it gets replaced with guilt. We all remember what happened to Joanie Laurer after all, and I fear the same ending too if this keeps up.
On the other hand there is literally no possibility she is a Listener or a Reader, so I suppose we have to keep calm and carry on (while watching somebody else do otherwise.)]
Another Patreon puller! The Hosses are reviving the old RD & Blade Show for supporters, with the (now solidified as) 42nd released earlier. And yes, as you can see below this I will be summarizing those also. Yay me. You'll have to support them to get the episode link though to listen to the episodes themselves though. I'm not interfering in business and freeloading you know! At least today's episode (of that, not WWCR) is less than half an hour, for old times' sake.
Blade makes a Big Announcement for some reason. (:07)
RD remembers Jimmy Jack Funk being at every house show he attended. (:10) Blade went to a four hour show that angered his parents.
Like me RD prefers to drink his drink cold. (:16) At Christmas he got some "artisan" Alaskan water from his brother. He drinks that while he plays Tammy's music again on Blade's behalf. According to Blade's Facebook following she was cooking pork (to RD's surprise and active imagination) and got surprised by a video of someone...eating.
Rebel looks different with a new gimmick as a "Panda Doll". (:22) RD prefers her to Baby Doll, as lovely and charming as she is otherwise. Blade likes BD though and remembers the time he hunted down one of her centerfolds. RD gets confused by Blade's "Eucalyptus Cry".
In May in Indiana Billy Gunn will appear in a "Bash For Babies". You know what that means, yes? It means he likes to f...ight. (:28)
Speaking of fighting Tammy found herself single a week after her engagement. This is a not a repeat from the last time this has happened. (:34) Blade does some random impression. Unsurprisingly she's reconsidered her public "retirement".
Speaking of people who should retire, Mike Check sadly does not repeat the time he spent in Brazil playing heavy metal to heavy metal miners. (:36) Blade is surprised he's been around for so long. He was once in Moscow...Idaho, also in the '80s, in KRMN "The Kremlin" as Ivan Gorbachev. RD manages to escape by the playing of Debbie Reynolds. (:40) Blade reads some "Breaking Tammy News" in which she was hospitalized (to remove her gallbladder). This is not a repeat from the last time this has happened. Blade: "You can tell I've been drinking." She wants to file for "malpractice" (though sadly not for the malpractice of her career), so of course she asks on Facebook and gets surprised when people tell her the obvious. Blade will have some of what she's having.
Speaking of Facebook, Rob Lambka asks about wrestlers having a love connection or something. (:44) Blade wanted 2006 Mickie James and Robecca Di Pietro (whatever happened to her anyway?) Speaking of people who wish they were back in 2006 (and in love), Tammy again got surprised when people tell her the obvious. Blade does an impression. So does RD.
Blade fondly remembers identifying with Adrian Adonis and watching him wrestle Tito Santana to not win the Intercontinental Title. (:52) RD tries to relay his favorite match of Jerry Lawler vs. Bret Hart at Summerslam 93 which un/fortunately did not have a Sunny run-in. Blade "says" he is too "broken" (as he characteristically and show-stopping laughs like a slow moving river) to read another post, so RD gets him to read it via Sir Alec. (:59) That's what I'm talking about. RD is surprised she 'interacts' on her pages at least. Or perhaps that's because she has nothing better to do? (I was going to say 'appear on Impact' but Joanie did that already. We all know how that turned out.)
Speaking of having nothing better to do, Tammy suddenly wants another boyfriend to break off an engagement to. (:66) She asks her Facebook followers that she likes so much for a one night stand in Lancaster, PA, romance capital of America (and actual capital for a day), with the power of (Diamond Dan's) HOTTness.
Blade: "She's on the prowl now!"
RD: "Somebody call the animal patrol!"
Tammy's in love:
Hey wealthy women.
Looking for a trophy wife?
Willing to switch teams.
$0.50 : $31.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Patreon, WrestleCrapRadio.com
f you could play Cupid, what wrestlers would you want to get together? Tam interruptus.
WrestleCrap 3 Count (incomplete): The 3 greatest non-Royal Rumble or non-WrestleMania matches ever?
RD: SummerSlam 1993 Hart vs Lawler
Blade: Adrian Adonis vs Tito Santana on Tuesday Night Titans
Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Rhonda vs Lynch is interrupted by Tam. So what does the professional do? He improvises.
Hey wealthy women.
Looking for a trophy wife?
Willing to switch teams.
Bonus: you can now "listen" to the radio progrem as a YouTube video, if for some reason you prefer it that way. Warning: Satisfaction and sanity are not guaranteed.
"If it were in my power, and if I had the responsibility, I would try the sunny way."
- Wilfrid Laurier, 7th Prime Minister of Canada, proto-Spock cosplayer
RD attempts to play it straight. This lasts for a minute before his "doorbell" rings. His subsequent receiving of a package, which contains the SeanceTrolla N08 Cauldron, makes Blade laugh. He turns it on, making it play cliche "scary music" and causing a dot matrix printer to print him an ominous warning. (:08)
'Someone' told Blade last progrem that his low register voice makes him sound sleepy. And here I thought he was just drunk or hungover.
As is his eternal custom Roddy Piper warns the kids about idiots in cars. Blade has some issues with his syntax. (:13)
Blade: "You know, wouldn't it be fun if we were like down to two listeners, and those two listeners were named RD Reynolds and Blade Braxton?"
A now teenage RD Junior has been to Disneyworld at least once a year. (:17) Sad News: Rafiki's ride is being shut down (it's the circle of life you see).
Blade shills being on TV and in more horror movies. (:24)
Brooke Hogan: Fashion Hero's 2nd season is going international. Apparently this is a thing. Blade sings badly without RD's MIDI to accompany him.
At Wrestlecon April 5th Joey Ryan will have some sort of Penis Party right in the middle of the MetLife stadium. Blade does some more random singing.
Piper reminds people to say please and thank ya.
Tammy has finally been released from prison. (:35) She now wants to do a "farewell tour" before going back to school and "private life". For her sake and well-being, I sincerely hope it works out this time. Unfortunately experience and history tells me things won't change for the better, not even now. One has to just wait and see I suppose.
Blade continues to confuse himself with the Midnight Rose. Why, it's almost like they're one and the same person.
The Cauldron threatens Blade this time with a Pete Townshend lyric. Blade is definitely one to get fooled again. And again. And again after that. (:38)
Derek Quinn of the Powerhouse of Sound DJ Service (3), asks about other wrestlers who might provide their own Halloween safety tips. (:39) They think Virgil could work. RD also wants to pay for Tammy to give tips. (That sure sounded wrong.) They also want Ken Patera, what with his experience with being hungry.
Piper reminds you to take (all) your candy back home to your parents before you eat it. (:42)
:46 Before the two can continue to further mess around as is their itinerary, the OG SeanceTrolla activates, "reviving" Nate and his coarse voice to strangle RD in the name of TNA Total Non Stop Action Wrestling. On the other end a sleepy Blade is "woken up" by John Kelly, who has sources. (:50)
Only Johnny 6 is left to do the Haiku (:51) in a rather lower register of voice than usual for some reason. Perhaps he too is sleepy. Further, his theme boops and beeps that bring him in are of somewhat of a low quality this time around, most likely due to the hard work of the SeanceTrolla reviving him into undeath and NOT because RD lost the original version and asked us for a replacement copy.
No, really.
Silver Shamrock:
Ha. Ppy. Hall. O. Ween.
Ha. Ppy. Ha. Ppy. Hall. O. Ween.
Ha. Ppy. Hall. O. Ween.
Piper reminds you to have lots of fun trick-or-treating, and if you have any leftover/bad candy to send to Vince to poison him.
$31.00 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
Halloween
WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 3. Patreon, wrestlecrapradio.com, Drive in Movie Maniacs
Coincidentally today's episode is also sponsored by Snickers.
In which Jim is amenable for a change, Sir Alec is out without his music or audience, Mike Check has a proper honest living, Popeye is blown down by a cucumber, Dixie Carter runs the cashier better than she does a company, the Honky Tonk Mailman delivers an Apter mag off podcast, (Sir) Stubby has more wood than paper, RD voices an alley cat, then shills his arcade as Jeff Foxworthy if possible, Nintendo John is NOT summoned despite referencing a Virtual Boy, and all the while (Mr.) Blade Rogers Braxton attempts to stifle his laughter.
I look forward to him being the next TNA correspondent once somebody photoshops Blade's head onto that infamous picture of Rogers inadvertently giving the finger (while counting).
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Patreon, PBS Viewers Like You
Guest Stars: 8. Featuring “Happy” Jim Ross as the butcher, Sir Alec Heineken, Mike Check as the
store manager, Popeye as a fellow shopper, Dixie Carter as a grocery
store clerk, Stubby as Sir Stubby Fairchild, RD Reynolds as Henrietta Alley Cat,
and RD Reynolds (2) as the Arcade Repairman.
Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: No haiku this week, but Mr. Braxton sang to the viewers about needs and wants.
20 minutes
((( recorded in high phone-muffled fidelity )))
Some vintage albeit bad Wrestlemania related tune takes up 10% of the running time.
You know this episode is an April Fools prank when RD skips a number. This would technically be the FORTIETH episode if based on the old RD&BS format, but instead this is apparently the forty-FIRST. Perhaps Blade's (under the) influence got to him too much. Seriously; (mike) check through the Recaps link and see for yourself.
[That being said, if you counted this as both a WWCR AND RD&BS episode separately and together, like two intersecting lines, that might work things out. That assumes anything actually works on these shows of course though. Both in and unintentionally.]
RD: "You realize we've had more RD & Blade shows than Wrestlemania."
Blade remembers Susan St. James uh-oh-ing. RD remembers Rockin' Robin and her Brother Hood. (:05)
This year's WM (33) has 13 matches that will take at least six and a half hours long. (:08)
RD is stuck on the Divas' movesets. (:09)
More random names are in the Andre The Giant Battle Royal Memorial hootenanny. (:11) RD wants a Bill Frehlick run-in.
Randy Orton is in another match. (:12) Blade doesn't want to see him dating. RD wants to see his orgasmic wife make a return to the ring.
Social Security recipient Undertaker is once again back at it. (:14) Blade: "I don't mind Roman Reigns." RD: "Blade Braxton Quote: "I don't mind Roman Reigns.""
Blade thinks Shane McMahon should fight while high. RD thinks he will jump off a roller coaster. (:15)
RD on WM as a whole and echoing many people: "Who cares?"
RD has to "run" to a Wrestlemania party which will last even longer than the 12 hour event. (:16)
When you take a look at these nominations all I have to say is...Thank God I'm not watching WWE these days! Hit it!
Return of The Gooker, once again, Return of The Gooker, Oh My Lord!
Raging_Demons here once again kiddies. Yes while not dealing with Mike Check I get to do this once in a while. It is once again Gooker Time. Yes the 2016 nominations of The Gooker are out. The Gooker represents by the wrestling fans as the most recognized award for the worst ever in pro wrestling. Be it a match, a storyline, a wrestling character, and for the first time EVER the grand daddy of them all, they are eligible to receive the award for the worst of the worst.
Luckily I missed most of this mess. For those that don't follow me social or comment wise I am no longer watching WWE. It had started with that "Sting's Road to Wrestlemania" garbage giving that feeling that all it was is simply for Vinnie Mac to stroke his cock. Then we add Road Dogg's insensitive Twitter comments basically saying, and I'm paraphrasing here and also this is important since Road Dogg is a WWE Road Agent now (Gee I wonder how he GOT THAT JOB?!?) where he said "Sure you can go try it out (referring to watching other wrestling promotions like New Japan, Ring Of Honor, and even TNA of all things) but we all know that you'll be back (referring to always coming back and watching WWE)" which I found completely tasteless. The straw that broke the camel's back was one guy's constant, never ending push even thought he's got the physical gifts but the actual talent of a Ziggy comic.
You know the guy. Roman Reigns. That was it! Thank God for The Broken Hardy's for bringing me back to wrestling.
So I got to watched all of this for you and let me say...
God damn 2016 was bad! Did The Ratings Reaper try to kill actual wrestling talent as well?
Without further adieu here are your 2016 Gooker Nominations!
AND THEY ARE....
1. Wrestlemania 32: There have been several close attempts for a Wrestlemania, deemed "The Grand Daddy Of Them All", to be nominated for a Gooker, but this is a first time EVAH that a Wrestlemania has been nominated for a Gooker. Not only the event was WAY longer than the entire run of "Firefly" but most of the matches were either ranging from mediocre to god awful. Yes even Shane McMahon's match with The Undertaker were in the lines of cringe worthy.
2. Jeff Jarrett Selling "Global Force Gold": Hey you! Yes you! You like Jeff Jarrett? You like Jarrett's idea of a World Pro Wrestling League called "Global Force Wrestling"? You like gold? I know you like gold! Well Jeff Jarrett has a deal FER YOU! Sure selling gold may look like a pyramid scheme of Herbalife levels and this makes all the gold selling commercials that you see on FOX News seem even less credible than this, but its gold right? RIGHT?!?
3. Darren Young versus Titus O' Neill with Young's Life Coach...Bob Backlund?!?: Personally speaking I think that Darren Young gets constant crap level gimmicks due to the part that he's openly gay. Pro Wrestling at times can be so mentally backwards. Heck, Paul Heyman and Colt Cobana admitted in interviews that there's still antisemitism in pro wrestling today! Okay mini-rant over moving on. Bob Backlund has been a great character in the previous years, even Mick Foley admitted that in one of his books; I think it was "Foley Is Good" but I'm not quite sure but don't let me know about via Social Media okay. SO what do you do to make Darren Young a wrestler on Roman Reigns' level? You...force him to feud Titus O' Neill over and over again with Backlund doing random stuff during the feud that makes no sense what so ever. HUH?!?
4. Enzo Amore's TRIP TO...Sensitivity Training: Remember this kiddies...
Okay take the same premise, change it a little, let's say...a sensitivity class. Put in Enzo Amore, who is so freaking huge right now it's not funny. Enzo Amore is big, GABBY HAYES BIG! What you end up is a set of "comedy" skits, and I refer to "comedy" in this sense as in you were supposed to laugh at the jokes but instead you look at it and say to yourself "Who the hell wrote this crap?" Like what you're reading right now. OH!
The bottom line here is that these "Sensitivity Training" skits made Enzo Amore look real bad here.
5. The Big Nippled Vampire (Shelly Martinez) versus Rebel: Every Wrestlecrap Radio Listener (all 12 of them) and even us here at Wrestlecrapradio.com knows who Shelly Martinez is. She's The BNV, the Big Nippled Vampire. Shelly got that name during her times in the WWE version of ECW running around as a vampire with giant fake fun bags with, as RD Reynolds would say about her nipples are "big and round as a dinner plate". Shelly is also a great wrestler and entertainer wise and I personally met her and she is a good person...Just don't try to start an argument with her because she will win! Oh yes she will! So what happen when a highly trained wrestler like Shelly Martinez goes up against a VERY GREEN wrestler like Rebel who is known for only two things: She can wear jean shorts so tiny that they look like she's wearing a thong and she's real life best friends with Christy Hemme? Put the two together and you get a match that is SO BAD that if I air the video here right now you would sue all of us for causing such psychological damage and I SO do not want that to happen! I hate to steal RD's gimmick but...SPEAKING OF HORRIBLE BAD THINGS!
6. The Wyatt Compound Match: There were a lot of people not happy that "Broken" Matt Hardy and his hijinks along with "Brother Nero" (I Knew You Would Come!) Jeff Hardy should be a shoe-in for a Gooker, but lets face the facts here that Matt Hardy actually created what WWE has been trying for years. Actual "Sports Entertainment" that is good. With the popularity of The Broken Hardyz WWE decided to do one little, itty, bitty, tiny thing. They tried to rip-off "The Final Deletion", turn it into a gimmick match with The Wyatt Family and The New Day, and turned it into a third rate garbage match that hasn't been seen in years. Let me edit that for a sec here. They ripped-off "The Final Deletion", made it into a fifth rate garbage match, and they ripped off Rob Zombie and his movies by making that match look like crap that Uwe Boll poops out. By the way I'm way glad Uwe Boll is retired. Gotta steal Deal's gimmick again here. SPEAKING OF THE NEW DAY!
7. The New Day vs Luke Gallows and Karl Anderson Feud: Poor Luke Gallows. He started as the mouth breather Festus, became liberated in The Straight Edge Society, and was a part of Aces and Eights. Yeesh! I feel bad for the guy. Gallows FINALLY gets some success in New Japan as a part of The Bullet Club. Then he along with fellow Bullet Club members AJ Styles and Karl Anderson get signed by WWE. While AJ Styles gets his own solo push the other two, Gallows and Anderson, get...this crappy feud right here! The Old Day? Midget New Day members? Anderson holding a jar of Big E's testicles saying that "he got no balls?" Did Triple H give Gallows and Anderson a D-Generation X Joke Book and say "Here do everything in this book when you are feuding with The New Day?" FFS MAN!
8. The Shining Stars: OK what the hell! It all begins with Primo and Epico getting a attractive female valet. Then they become comical masked bullfighters with a pet midget dressed as a bull. Now they are Puerto Rico time share sallsmen! What the hell did they do to deserve this crap?!?
Oh yeah, they're related to this guy here!
[I'm quite astonished no one has yet memed on Carlito having Giorgio "The A is for Aliens" Tsoukalos' hair. - PB]
9. The Golden Truth: What happens when you combine R-Truth and Goldust?
Oh Hell No! Instead of two wild and crazy guys we got two guys stuck in a constant loop of really bad jokes and honestly I'm quite offended. I'm supposed to be the one to tell lame jokes around here!
10. TNA in 2016: My personal pick for who should win the Gooker. TNA in 2016 was literally quite a huge embarrassment. First they started to stiff their wrestlers and their technical staff with not paying them. Then they lost wrestlers and staff left and right. Then they had to beg around to get money to do some recording of shows which is downright sad. Then they had wrestlers perform piss poor matches on TV since they are no longer a wrestling company. Then they began stiffing all their creditors not paying them back. Then they got an investor like Billy Corgan, who ran his own (actual) wrestling promotion, to invest in them only to alienate and steal from him. Its like all of this is a giant scheme of some sorts...
(Credit: James Hornsby over at BotchedSpot.com. Check it out now! Its one of my favorite websites!)
Whatever or however TNA does business is beyond me. After all the stupid stuff that they do they always finds a way to stay alive. With recent news event Dixie Carter is now gone from TNA, having new owners from Anthem Sports (Finding new buyers to take over is WAY beyond me for a money-pit of an organization like TNA), and just recently re-signing Dutch Mantell and Jeff Jarrett (Have you heard? Our current Gooker Nominee has a way for you to be rich on gold!) they can actually get out of this mess but in 2016 you can teach a class on TNA on how many times TNA FUBAR'ed.
Blade is the ECW Zombie (RIP) to RD's WCW Phantom (also RIP). The former talked to their 'producers' who 'told him' to turn down his mic volume to once again become Jazz Overnight, much to the latter's delight.
RD then abruptly receives a 'certified letter' from the Trolla Corporation. Yes, an actual mailed letter. Recent budget cuts you see. (:05) They are recalling their (one) HorseTrolla 'notification device' due to mythical centaur related concerns. He doesn't believe them; they still need to do some shenanigans since April Fools after all! (Yeah that wasn't an April Fool's Joke. I had Chris Engler send that letter. I mean we did create Zombie Nathaniel. --Raging_Demons) So when it neighs up it sounds slower and fails to deliver any news. Wait, is it a news machine or a breaking down car? Of course RD dismisses the whole thing as mere happenstance, even as he tempts fate throughout by running it every now and then.
Blade: "Are we going to get on with the episode now or what?"
Then he breaks into laughter. (:11) RD then has to explain to him the concept of soaping.
RD self-shills for donations with his Nathaniel impression. Help a brother or two out? (:14) Blade repeats his idea of a pledge drive/telethon with his Stubby impression. Raging_Demons does his part to shill for this here website with his Premier Blah impression. ("I'm officially the voice of Halloween! Also if I knew I was going to be used again I would had updated it with this year's "Halloween Hootenanny on The Mike Check Show where Mike & his daughter have to survive the horror that is...Zombie Nathaniel!" --Raging_Demons)(:19) The eternal Roddy Piper provides his ever useful Halloween safety tips in his Nada impression.
Blade has yet to find some Captain Crunch Halloween Cereal, much to RD's shock. (:21) Blade wishes him a Merry Christmas, as many people preemptively do in October. As this is an election year Monster Cereals allow people to vote on their mascots. Sadly, his Boo Berry is as of this writing currently taking a huge beating from Count Chocula (though at least independent candidate Franken Berry is not posing any challenge to them both, only having Montana and its state population of 5 people to his name.). The duo agree Piper should get his own special Halloween "Please and Thank Ya" trading cards.
The FaxTrolla is still working to RD's pride. Blade wants to run cliffhangers that have no chance in Hades of working. (:33) WWE is promoting TMNT figure variations of their wrestlers superstars. RD is flabbergasted that people would want to spend $15 on them instead of supporting their site. WWE also runs some sort of 'hilarity' using zombified versions of their wre - superstars on their page using jokes from the 90's WWF magazine. RD does his Crickets impression.
RD advises Blade not to send him any Tamm related gifts. RD then has to explain to him (again) the concept of soaping. (:41) Sad News: she's in jail "forever" according to Blade's insights. RD uses it as an excuse to no longer talk about her or listen to Debbie Reynolds sing about her.
Not to be outdone, Blade uses some bad MIDI (which sounds even worse than the standard fare) to talk about Paige. RD's disgust makes Blade break into laughter. (:46) The week prior she had proposed to Alberto Del Rio in the middle of the ring. Blade compares his bad indie wrestling gimmicks to RD's bad indie wrestling gimmicks.
For some reason (and not because it's on the itinerary) Blade persuades RD to call up Jim who also seasons greetings them. (:53) He's doing all the holidays at once to save time and money. Sadly he no longer has his UWF Haunted House running. RD's laughter breaking causes Jim to also laughter break. Bob Caudle messed something up which Jim has to handle, among so many other things going wrong in his life (like hiring an extremely old man as his sole employee).
ECW Press is again wanting RD to write The Death Of TNA, and with the further shenanigans it's going through yet again and once more, he thinks of the 'wrestling' company as the perfect horror movie villain. Just when you think they're down and out they get right back up!...although in their case it's a movie villain no one wants to see. Even more than that time Jason Voorhees went into space to reenact a bad Alien rip-off. (:62)
Piper once more tells Blade to send your poisoned and razor bladed treats to Vince McMahon to transform him into Moolah. (:66)
Mickie James (now on NXT) confuses Blade with her appearance. This time (of course) the HorseTrolla comes to life and roves around the place (instead of floating like an apparition SHOULD be doing) wrecking havoc like a low rent Thin Man's sphere. That or RD is also playing a Shin Megami Tensei/Persona game for the first time and was caught off-guard by the series' notorious difficulty.
So here we go, Seventeen Syllables:
RD is now dead.
I did not know he was sick.
Headless HorseTrolla.
Then Blade breaks into laughter.
$28.50 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
Halloween
WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 6. Trolla Corp, WrestleCrap.com, WrestleCrapRadio.com, Mike Check Show, Christmas at the Skyline Theater, Atomic Cotton T-Shirts
URLs not taken: 0.
SPEAKING OFs: 1. Mickie James
Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
Phone Calls & Run Ins: 5. Mysterious Delivery Man, Mysterious WCR Shill Guy, “Rowdy” Roddy Piper, Bill Cosby, Jim
F-Bombs: 1. Jim
Blade Time Outs: 3 (1 Real Quick)
RD Time Outs: 1
Huey The Ghoul Laughs: 7
You're Hurtin' Me, Randy!: 1
Question of the Week from: N/A
Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Entertain the folks Blade: RD is now dead.
I did not know he was sick.
Headless HorseTrolla.
(In yet more time travel related shenanigans) "Kasem Casey" on WTKO The Knockout "counts down" some of the various times the Co-Fruitcakes and their "guest" characters sang on the radio progrem, complete with the full swearing left in! Can you believe it's been 3 years since they last sung with their seductive golden tones over bad MIDI tracks while RD laughed uncontrollably in the background? (Assuming you take it from the RD & Blade Show. Otherwise it's been 5 years since their last song from the original incarnation of the radio progrem. And 10 years since they last did an episode.)
Speaking of singing badly, you may remember when Blade had a WWCR Songs MySpace page that he forgot the password to, followed by having his own singing MySpace page when that was a thing for two whole months.
The songs in questionable question:
Blade sings about Jim's troubles as The Barbequer. (:02)
RD & Blade badly mangle the theme from Good Times. (:07)
Blade wouldn't spend 10,000 Bucks on Ashley Massaro. (:17)
A totally real request from Ed Han Salo concerning 'a long distance dedication to his dog' (Poor guy, hasn't he suffered enough already on this show???) brings up The Twelve Days Of Christmas. (:21)
RD 'sings' some cobbled together Dr. Feelgood MIDIs. Technically that doesn't count as a 'song'. (:32)
There is one new song at least, when the Cast Of Characters & Soundbites & Trolla Corporation products sing that in fact We Are WrestleCrap Radio, featuring an extended guest appearance from Jim which is enough to revive both Johnny 4 AND 6. Don't ask. Yes, again. (:43)
"Stewart Patrick": "I am here to sing my song. I'm leaving now."
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
April Fools
WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 5. American Florists, Whirlpool, Mike Check bumper stickers, Folgers Coffee, Budweiser
URLs not taken: 0.
SPEAKING OFs: 0. Magazines, nostalgic, movies, derailing the show
Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
America’s Top 40 with Casey Kasem: Top 10 WrestleCrap Radio Songs
10. The BBQer by Blade Braxton
(to the tune of “The Gambler” by Kenny Rogers)
9. The Good Times Theme (cover) by RD and Blade Braxton
8. It’s So Hard to Say Goodbye to Mickie James by Blade Braxton
(to the tune of “So Hard to Say Goodbye to Yesterday” by Boyz II Men)
7. Didn’t Know He Was Sick by Blade Braxton and R.D. Reynolds (featuring Krankor and Mama)
(to the tune of “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel)
6. 10,000 Bucks by Blade Braxton
(to the tune of “10,000 Miles” by The Proclaimers)
Long Distance Dedication
Ed “Han” Solo for his dog Snuggles
WrestleCrap Radio 12 Days of Christmas
5. Dr. Feelgood (Motley Crue) by RD Reynolds
4. Boob Pop by Blade Braxton
(to the tune of “Mmm Bop” by Hanson)
3. Goodbye Boogeyman by RD and Blade Braxton
(to the tune of “Candle in the Wind” by Elton John)
2. Brown Haired Trish by Blade Braxton
(to the tune of “Brown Eyed Girl”
1. We Are WrestleCrap Radio by WrestleCrap
(to the tune of We Are the World” by various artists)
Phone Calls & Run Ins: 35. Mike Check, Casey Kasem, Jim, Bob and Weave, Sammy Sugar
Daddy, CS John Kelly, Jim (2), Popeye, Satan, Sir Alec
Heineken, Dixie Carter, Stubby, Nintendo John, Mike Check (2), Midnight
Rose, BM Punk, Suzy Shuffle, Mike Check (3), Blade, RD,
Stubby (2), Popeye (2), Bill Cosby, Jim (3), Dixie Carter (2), Midnight Rose (2), Mama, Lord Alfred Hayes, Huey
the WrestleCrap Radio Ghoul, Crickets, Debbie Reynolds, Weird Al, Johnny
4, Stewart Patrick
F-Bombs: 14. Blade, Jim, Blade (2), Blade (3),
Blade (4), Jim (2), Jim 2 (3), Jim 2 (5), Jim (6), Jim (7), Jim 2 (9),
Jim (10)
.JPG/800px-Wilfrid_Laurier_in_1907_(Spocked).JPG)
