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| 12 years later, hopefully the "Hydraulic Lift" & the "wheel chair roll" won't be part of Kurt Angle's "moveset" after TLC? |
120 minutes
RD managed to find the censor button on his recording machine. This does not stop today's radio progrem from being two fucking hours long.
Kurt Angle is due to wrestle a match. This is a not a repeat from TNA. RD proudly proclaims they have more scoops than anyone in town, including a now rolling in his grave Al Isaacs. Blade thinks the show is viral meningitis. I would say that term is redundant, if it were not true.
It's been seven months since the last recording, enough time for someone to have a premature child according to RD's calculations [Actually, it's been 6 months and 21 days, but I think the Clocktrolla broke down long before we could get an accurate reading? -R.V.M Kai]. This is even longer than the 4 1/2 months taken between the first ending of WWCR to do their TURDBUS show [And to think, in 2011, the period between episodes #199 and #200 seemed so long at the time...but were only 77 days apart? -R.V.M Kai].
Blade makes RD have PTSD flashbacks to the time Mike Check did the Star Wars convention market. (:06)
During their absence Blade went traveling around and lost 50 pounds, getting below 200, while RD has continued to write for the site and helped to open and run an arcade. He gives his Co-Hosss a round of
RD needs sponsors again, not just for the progrem but also for the site. (:13) He's aiming to go on Patreon like many other folks have before him (such as this awesome fellow who I've been happily supporting for quite a long while) to keep WC running. Blade is so low maintenance he only needs $1000 a month to get by. Canadian I'm sure.
:16 RD was once again in the Netherlands for his other work, as well as bringing more food to try. He suggests to always make some space in your luggage for this purpose. Blade has to drink Jack Daniels because soup is too expensive where he is at.
RD: "Kids, do you want Blade Braxton to be in the soup line?"
This time he brought "Deep Ridged Lay's in Sweet Chilli flavor" "spelled with two l's for some reason"...which it should normally be. I think RD can't spell like Blade can't count. The chips are yellow instead of orange on the packaging. He chews loudly and notes they seem "burned" for some reason.
While Blade was in Cannes with the Troma folk (:24) he had roasted chicken chips which taste just like mom used to make. He will order some in time for the next episode in five years' time.
Speaking of food the Faxtrolla announces the arrival of some Obscure Wrestling Food. (:26) Some pizza place in Ottawa, home of Anthem Entertainment, is going to have some sort of "Impact Food" for a couple of days with some funny sounding names. Blade and the Honky Tonk Mailman once found a Sbarro's serving breakfast. He also tried pulled pork tacos for the first time while in Texas. He still prefers chicken while RD prefers beef.
Sheamus is to have a "Celtic Warrior Program" for exercise, sadly not featuring Larry Bird. (:34)
Blade managed to find some bad MIDI version of The Way We Were. He uses it to bring up memories, seeing as he asked people for their favorite obscure progrem memories. This is not a repeat from the last 15 years this has been done before. (:35) RD can't even remember what he had for breakfast this morning.
RD remembers killing Get In The Ring Radio, and interviewing Bill Watts with them before doing so. Blade remembered hearing Chavo Guerrero Classic taking a leak while interviewing with them. He once again teases a Big Announcement. (:44)
- Blade remembered when he and Don couldn't habitually insult a schoolgirl from their car because his mother admonished him "It's Christmas, Blade."
- Blade visited RD and the two were mistaken for being a gay couple.
- Blade was too hungover to stay on the line with Lance Storm.
- Blade once worried about wrestlers being shot down in warzones while playing bad music from helicopters, since playing Creed in any battleground is considered a war crime.
- Blade still thinks the Million Dollar Mare would be a license to print money.
- Blade breaks down remembering Shawn Michael's playground business and having to wear a funk sock for entry.
[I'd find the links for those if I was more inclined to do so, so I delegate that to my colleagues, assuming they're still around and haven't fled yet. [No, I'm still trapped here...Help! -R.V.M Kai]]
RD wants people to send in both real AND fake memories so that they can test their memories and make a memory game of it it and their "Game Show Trolla" (A GST if you will.)
The HorseTrolla neighs about "Old" Mickie James fighting Alexa Bliss. (:55)
:57 For a change RD plays Tammy's music himself of his own volition. The two texted to each other a lot during their hiatus like competing lovers. Blade: "I've been drinking." Apparently she's come closer to home - WC home, not the Big House home, by randomly posting on the old WC forums, now renamed FAN (Freakin' Awesome Network). She liked the "big giant flying turtle" in the Godzilla franchise...which is Gamera, and a different franchise (one which is really neat and is filled with turtle meat). What, Tammy wrong again? You don't say! Blade had broken Godzilla toys back in his day.
Also she went to an arcade and didn't like it. She definitely didn't go to Rupert's Kids Arcade, which would delight just about anyone attending, I guarantee it!
RD finally knows how to mute himself. (:63)
Instead of answering Questions RD attempts to call a Miss Cyndi for her favorite WWCR moment (the one where RD left early due to Blade having fun with the Katie Vick outfit), only to hit her answering machine. That's pretty much symbolic of the show as a whole. (:67) So they call Zane U Paisley instead. Fortunately after hitting HIS answering machine he manages to call back, although somewhat stymied that they called him at 11 pm while he was in bed. He coaches U12 soccer on weekends you see, so RD goes on about AJ Styles' high kicks. Also he was to be their Co-Hosss Coach back when Blade was still remembering to look for one on the last show. His favorite memory was when he was their Roast drinking beer while the Ratings Reaper was getting creampied. (Ahem.) RD is angry his favorite moment is about himself (well, yes?), so he sends Zane away.
Blade does not have an itinerary because he doesn't have a paper plate on hand for it.
:77 Like many, RD was deeply saddened and heartbroken by the passing of Bobby Heenan, remembering him and the many times he got him through some hard times, of which he pays forward with his own work. They call up a gentleman named Dan who had re-found some portions of his recorded interview made many years back with The Brain hidden away in the Archives, and is rewarded with Blade doing his (non-Rambo) Greg Gagne impression. Dan remembers Blade and his audible beard in the times when he was listening to the show with a bad connection. This causes Blade to break down again. RD: "We don't make great memories any more, no."
RD plays some portions of his recorded interview which was made on actual audio tape. Needless to say, it is recorded in Watergate quality fidelity. (:92 - :101)
Blade remembers when Adrian Adonis joined Heenan's Family in the 80s for some strange reason. RD remembers when he and Monsoon visited Busch Gardens and his actual daughter kicked him in the shins. Blade then remembers the duo messing around at some boxing training camp. RD follows up by remembering them during the time No Holds Barred was sprung on an unsuspecting audience and Monsoon was petitioning the Academy for an Oscar for the Hulkster. Perhaps WWF would have named Ed Leslie as Oscar if they could have.
Back to Kurt Angle once again wrestling in WWE for the first time in over 10 years, RD is forced to remember when he gushed all over his moveset. (:109) The two listen to it again. RD can barely last a minute before (rarely!) self apologizing for audibly boring Blade.
RD maintains that the Haiku is one of Blade's greatest things.
Seventeen easily digestible syllables:
Kurt Angle's moveset.
Twelve very long years later
RD feels randy.
$1.50 : $30.00 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
- 12th Anniversary
- WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 9. Diamond Dan’s Hotline, WrestleCrap.com, Rupert’s Kids Arcade & Party Room, Patreon, Crust and Crate, West-ridge Mall , Purple Stuff Podcast, DinosaurDracula.com, Angry MarksWrestleCrap.com
- URLs not taken: 0.
- SPEAKING OFs: 1. Perfect timing.
- Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
- Phone Calls & Run Ins: 3. Coach Zane, Dan, Bobby “The Brain” Heenan
- F-Bombs: 5. Blade Braxton (3), Bobby “The Brain” Heenan (2)
- Blade Time Outs: 6 (3 Real Quick)
- RD Time Outs: 3 (Wait a minute, 2 Real Quick)
- RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 1
- Weird Al Laughs: 2
- Krankor Laughs: 1
- Mama’s Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes: 2
- Cricket Chirps: 2
- WrestleCrap Gongs: 1
- Question of the Week from: Two words: Train Wreck.
- Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: 12 year pay off on Kurt Angle:
Kurt Angle's moveset.
Twelve very long years later
RD feels randy.
