As written by "Blade Braxton" (taken from here):
"If you listened to the radio show (Wrestlecrap Radio: Episode #63. May 18, 2007), you heard my sad tale of the Ghetto Amusement Park Skeletor and He-Man. I went to the park expecting a giant Mattel Toys sponsored event, with neato, bright, and flashy officially licensed costumed characters. What I got, was the nightmare fuel you see below. For your further amusement, behold the horrors...
There's the Lord Of Destruction himself, Ghetto Amusement Park Skeletor, looking a little more flesh colored than usual, looking like he lost a few teeth due to not being able to put down the crack pipe, and he's dressed kind of like Dracula. This was a few seconds before the smurfer started chasing me around the merry-go-round in an obvious cocaine-fueled rage. Who could save me?
Not this assclown, Ghetto Amusement Park He-Man, who looks like he pawned the Power Sword for an ounce of weed. By the Power Of Potheads!!!!!!!!!!! Oh yeah, nice orange tank top underneath the armor there, "He-Man."
And believe it or not, even more frightening than Skeletor, was Ghetto Amusement Park Man-At-Arms. In a sane world, you could count on Man-At-Arms to save the day.
In this bizarro world I experienced that day, Ghetto Man-At-Arms has shaved his head, put on some mascara around his eyes and on top of his chrome dome, and striked a muscular pose like he was trying to woo a potential customer while he was man-whoring himself out on the point. I don't even want to know about the handcuffs he's wearing. Sigh, what a fraud-filled 1980's afternoon at Joyland, the Ghetto Amusement Park!!!!!!!"
(R.V.M Kai) Thanks Blade. The following WCR Video is taken from episode #63 as well as Blade's retelling of the "Ghetto Amusement Park" story almost a year later on episode #101 (April 25, 2008), which also includes a story of Blade's sister almost being "no longer being with us" after falling out of a ride...Oh, the days before health and safety standards.
(Video by R.V.M Kai)
And "speaking of the word "ghetto", it seems that Mike Check was inspired by this video to play "In the Ghetto" by Elvis Presley on THE MIKE CHECK SHOW!
...And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!
WCR Video: Song: Brown Haired Trish
On the latest episode of Wrestlecrap Radio (#270), Blade Braxton interviewed former WWE Women's Champion Trish Stratus. With only brief amount of time allocated, Blade decided to ask the one most important question of all...What is Trish's favorite breakfast cereal? Perhaps Blade could have used that time to ask her a more important question...does she prefer being blonde or brunette? Well, RD and Blade debated that question back in 2009, on WCR episode #157, where RD was not happy about his beloved "Patty" changing her famous blonde colored hair to "brown", whereas Blade dedicated his preference for "Brown Haired Trish" with a song to the tune of "Brown Eyed Girl" here on...THE WHACKER! (And if you want to listen to another "brunette" related song, Mike Check is also playing "Jeanie with the Light Brown Hair"...on THE MACKER!)
(Video Title "Blade Braxton - "Brown Haired Trish" (WrestleCrap Radio 9/18/09)" by Blade Braxton)
And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!
(Video Title "Blade Braxton - "Brown Haired Trish" (WrestleCrap Radio 9/18/09)" by Blade Braxton)
And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!
270 Tee Howard Tickle Party: February 28, 2018
72 minutes
Jeff Jarrett is a sudden (and possibly random) inductee in WWE'snostalgia-based marketing gimmick Hall Of Fame. RD hopes they showcase that time in TNA where he did random MMA stuff. This would all be better with a reporting TNA correspondent, exemplified by having the 'current' people of "Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley" now being the longest tenured despite only one (1) appearance. Other people would kill for such efficiency! (Or in real life Gene's case, be banned from Fox News - yes, THAT Fox News - for forgetting he's not thirty years younger.)
The week prior, RD wrote about Tito Santana introducing Vince to this thing called a 'taco', featuring a "Debra" from Gringos. RD is momentarily conflicted on whether to use the word or not. Gringo I mean, not taco. (:06) Lord Alfred was too busy there (not) sampling the food to appear to promotional considerate. That will come later.
Blade took a "TRISH to the Grocery" as Patty was at a comic convention he was visiting during filming for his TV show. (:08)
Blade: "She really dug me."
Due to the intense security around in Blade's words (which RD feels can be distracted with a Stan Lee cameo) he does manage to get from her that like me, she also enjoys frosted flakes for breakfast. (:14) RD: "Where's Lee Marshall when we need him?" He temporarily forgot he was sick, and nowadays tormenting Bobby Heenan in the afterlife of the Ely-Weasel Fields. (That sounded better in my mind admittedly.) The two are hung up on her temporarily forgetting frosted flakes are available in the US as they are in the old continent.
Blade randomly shills his appearance in another Troma movie. In response RD shills his guest appearance in a upcoming series by the name of Fanarchy TV that will be featured/avaiable on Amazon Prime/Video within the next day or so.
Sad News: Bray Wyatt is late on paying some monthly support to his ex/partner. (:22) He's only paid $6000 of the mandated $14735. Lest you think he's paying the rest on electric lanterns or purchasing that House of Horrors of his, sources have told that reporter $5000 was spent on "miniature horses supplies and foods", $500 on jewelry "not for his wife", and close to $300 at "Tootsie's Strip Club". Blade immediately wonders if Dustin Hoffman was involved while RD was amazed at how little he spent at a strip club.
Ric Flair has a "custom suit line" which Blade mishears as a soup line. (:29) Let us hope it lasts better than that time he decided to go into finance. Blade considers putting some of his old suits online.
Paige is back in the 'news' after being out of it for so long. So long in fact that Blade forgot about her Mexican restaurant that had punched a patron before closing. (:32) She got a (not Rick) rude tattoo on her hands, which is slightly better than the Harris brothers sprouting visible and later attempted modifying SS symbols on their arms. Blade has considered tattoo ideas for quite some time. RD suggests Miss Elizabeth, which leads to the two losing themselves in laughter over what it would consist of.
Laughter having temporarily woken him up, Blade feels better to get Sir Alec to do some delayed shilling, though he is gracious enough to inform people of what he does before he does so. (:38) The shilling causes Blade some "technical" difficulties via more laughter, but he manages to get through a few lines.
Brian Keith Johnson thinks Ric Flair (without his custom suit line) should have continued using his Black Scorpion powers throughout his career to win more titles. (:45) Back to being tired, Blade (drunkenly?) thinks he still used them regardless.
Coliseum Video on WWE Network is sadly without its theme music, swinging Ken Patera, or RD ejaculating. (:51) Goldberg, the Dudley Boyz, and Ivory will also be in the HOF, with Bam Bam Bigelow and Kid Rock rumored to join them as of this progrem recording.
In more "Three Counting" RD thinks New Jack, Ahmed Johnson, and Nikita Koloff speaking only in his "Russian" should also be nominated just so they can hear what wild induction speeches they would give. Blade thinks Hollywood should also be nominated due to her own work, as would Scott Steiner if he was accompanied by his Freaks (and potentially asked to do some calculations as part of his speech).
Blade also thinks Demolition should go in. If Vince can forgive Jeff Jarrett (like Bret Hart, Ultimate Warrior, and Randy Savage before him, even if in the name of good business) to enter, he could forgive Bill Eadie too for it. RD apologizes for the wrestling discussion on hand for newer listeners. Blade apologizes in response for making them both lose composure again by thinking about Howard The Duck interviewing Bill Eadie.
Seventeen Syllables Of Fun:
Improved 'Mania.
It's Howard The Duck versus
Demolition Ax.
$31.00 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Jeff Jarrett is a sudden (and possibly random) inductee in WWE's
The week prior, RD wrote about Tito Santana introducing Vince to this thing called a 'taco', featuring a "Debra" from Gringos. RD is momentarily conflicted on whether to use the word or not. Gringo I mean, not taco. (:06) Lord Alfred was too busy there (not) sampling the food to appear to promotional considerate. That will come later.
Blade took a "TRISH to the Grocery" as Patty was at a comic convention he was visiting during filming for his TV show. (:08)
Blade: "She really dug me."
Due to the intense security around in Blade's words (which RD feels can be distracted with a Stan Lee cameo) he does manage to get from her that like me, she also enjoys frosted flakes for breakfast. (:14) RD: "Where's Lee Marshall when we need him?" He temporarily forgot he was sick, and nowadays tormenting Bobby Heenan in the afterlife of the Ely-Weasel Fields. (That sounded better in my mind admittedly.) The two are hung up on her temporarily forgetting frosted flakes are available in the US as they are in the old continent.
Blade randomly shills his appearance in another Troma movie. In response RD shills his guest appearance in a upcoming series by the name of Fanarchy TV that will be featured/avaiable on Amazon Prime/Video within the next day or so.
Sad News: Bray Wyatt is late on paying some monthly support to his ex/partner. (:22) He's only paid $6000 of the mandated $14735. Lest you think he's paying the rest on electric lanterns or purchasing that House of Horrors of his, sources have told that reporter $5000 was spent on "miniature horses supplies and foods", $500 on jewelry "not for his wife", and close to $300 at "Tootsie's Strip Club". Blade immediately wonders if Dustin Hoffman was involved while RD was amazed at how little he spent at a strip club.
Ric Flair has a "custom suit line" which Blade mishears as a soup line. (:29) Let us hope it lasts better than that time he decided to go into finance. Blade considers putting some of his old suits online.
Paige is back in the 'news' after being out of it for so long. So long in fact that Blade forgot about her Mexican restaurant that had punched a patron before closing. (:32) She got a (not Rick) rude tattoo on her hands, which is slightly better than the Harris brothers sprouting visible and later attempted modifying SS symbols on their arms. Blade has considered tattoo ideas for quite some time. RD suggests Miss Elizabeth, which leads to the two losing themselves in laughter over what it would consist of.
Laughter having temporarily woken him up, Blade feels better to get Sir Alec to do some delayed shilling, though he is gracious enough to inform people of what he does before he does so. (:38) The shilling causes Blade some "technical" difficulties via more laughter, but he manages to get through a few lines.
Brian Keith Johnson thinks Ric Flair (without his custom suit line) should have continued using his Black Scorpion powers throughout his career to win more titles. (:45) Back to being tired, Blade (drunkenly?) thinks he still used them regardless.
Coliseum Video on WWE Network is sadly without its theme music, swinging Ken Patera, or RD ejaculating. (:51) Goldberg, the Dudley Boyz, and Ivory will also be in the HOF, with Bam Bam Bigelow and Kid Rock rumored to join them as of this progrem recording.
In more "Three Counting" RD thinks New Jack, Ahmed Johnson, and Nikita Koloff speaking only in his "Russian" should also be nominated just so they can hear what wild induction speeches they would give. Blade thinks Hollywood should also be nominated due to her own work, as would Scott Steiner if he was accompanied by his Freaks (and potentially asked to do some calculations as part of his speech).
Blade also thinks Demolition should go in. If Vince can forgive Jeff Jarrett (like Bret Hart, Ultimate Warrior, and Randy Savage before him, even if in the name of good business) to enter, he could forgive Bill Eadie too for it. RD apologizes for the wrestling discussion on hand for newer listeners. Blade apologizes in response for making them both lose composure again by thinking about Howard The Duck interviewing Bill Eadie.
*Make your own joke about Ax and Batista tag-teaming here* |
Seventeen Syllables Of Fun:
Improved 'Mania.
It's Howard The Duck versus
Demolition Ax.
$31.00 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right
Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)
- WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 5. Troma, Amazon Prime, Fanarchy, Patreon, WrestleCrapRadio.com
- URLs not taken: 2. DustinHoffmanwithathong.com, Swingingfullnelson.com
- SPEAKING OFs: 0.
- Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
- I didn’t even know he was sick: 1. Lee Marshall
- Phone Calls & Run Ins: 2. Trish Stratus, Sir Alec
- RJ Fletcher, Yes Man: 1
- Krankor Laughs: 3
- Weird Al Laughs: 1
- WrestleCrap Gongs: 2
- Question of the Week from: Brian Keith Johnson
- Why didn’t Ric Flair use more of his Black Scorpion magic in his matches? He might have won more titles. Blade: He used it at the 1992 Royal Rumble.
- WrestleCrap 3 Count: Who should be in the WWE Hall of Fame that aren’t?
-
RD: New Jack, Ahmed Johnson, Nikita Koloff.
-
Blade: Demolition, Hollywood, Scott Steiner
- Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Coming soon to a PPV near you:Improved 'Mania.
It's Howard The Duck versus
Demolition Ax.
WCR Video: If You Get Don On Me, I'll Get Don On You
Valentine's Day was a few days ago, and what says "love" better than getting "down" with Don...Don Mason? So get out the Reddi-Wip from the drawer and...make sure it doesn't come bubbling back?!
The following video is a parody created by one of Wrestlecrap Radio's 12 listeners, LannysPermJuice, using the song "Get Down" by obscure Canadian boy band "B4-4", which you can also hear on The Mike Check Show!
(Video by LannysPermJuice)
...And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!
The following video is a parody created by one of Wrestlecrap Radio's 12 listeners, LannysPermJuice, using the song "Get Down" by obscure Canadian boy band "B4-4", which you can also hear on The Mike Check Show!
(Video by LannysPermJuice)
...And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!
WCR Video: Wrestlecrap Fantasy Football Drag Queen's Debut
Since WWE Chairman and CEO Vince McMahon's announcement (in January 2018) of the return of the XFL in 2020, it prompted the return of another unsuccessful idea on Wrestlecrap Radio episode #269: "The Wrestlecrap Fantasy Football Drag Queen", but now with a new name; "The Wrestlecrap Radio XFL Queen".
For those who don't know, the WCFFDQ made his/her(?) debut on WCR episode #253 (Sept 20, 2015), from an idea sparked by RD Reynolds doing a bad falsetto on the previous episode, where the character called in to sing some fantasy football league advice to the tune of "I Hate Myself For Loving You" by Joan Jett and The Blackhearts (...which you can hear today over on The Mike Check Show's "Love On The Ropes Month"!)
...Predictably; his/her(?) said advice was terrible (edit: and still is!)
(Video by R.V.M Kai)
For those who don't know, the WCFFDQ made his/her(?) debut on WCR episode #253 (Sept 20, 2015), from an idea sparked by RD Reynolds doing a bad falsetto on the previous episode, where the character called in to sing some fantasy football league advice to the tune of "I Hate Myself For Loving You" by Joan Jett and The Blackhearts (...which you can hear today over on The Mike Check Show's "Love On The Ropes Month"!)
...Predictably; his/her(?) said advice was terrible (edit: and still is!)
(Video by R.V.M Kai)