WCR Video: Cartoon: Blade Braxton's Alien Ham Story

And here's one more Don...Don mason related YouTube video which takes Blade Braxton's "Alien Ham" Story and puts it into cartoon form (created by LannysPermJuice using GoAnimate.com).

And for those who don't know about the "Alien Ham" story, which was first told on Wrestlecrap Radio episode #15, here's an excerpt from the Wrestlecrap Radio Glossary, as written by wrestlecrapradio.com's own Raging_Demons:

"A story from Blade when he and Don...Don Mason were so drunk that Blade found a piece of ham that looked like the Alien from the "Alien" movies so he hid it under his bed. The next few days afterward his room was smelling pretty awful as if something had died in the room, so Blade cleaned his room up to find that piece of ham now rotting & smelling pretty rancid."



...Fascinating.

And speaking of Aliens, if you haven't been tuning in to The Mike Check Show's 7th Anniversary special, you would have missed Mike being abducted by Martians and being forced to host his radio progrem from Mars...although now it seems that STAN: The Evil Troll Lord has taken the Martians and ole Mike prisoner and...we have also learned that STAN (I am) does not Like "Green Eggs and (Alien) Ham" on...THE MACKER?! ...Fascinating?

And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives, and for more WCR cartoons, click here!

(272) Mr. Braxton's Neighborhood: April 1, 2018

32 minutes

Coincidentally today's episode is also sponsored by Snickers.
In which Jim is amenable for a change, Sir Alec is out without his music or audience, Mike Check has a proper honest living, Popeye is blown down by a cucumber, Dixie Carter runs the cashier better than she does a company, the Honky Tonk Mailman delivers an Apter mag off podcast, (Sir) Stubby has more wood than paper, RD voices an alley cat, then shills his arcade as Jeff Foxworthy if possible, Nintendo John is NOT summoned despite referencing a Virtual Boy, and all the while (Mr.) Blade Rogers Braxton attempts to stifle his laughter.

I look forward to him being the next TNA correspondent once somebody photoshops Blade's head onto that infamous picture of Rogers inadvertently giving the finger (while counting).
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 2. Patreon, PBS Viewers Like You
 
  • Guest Stars: 8. Featuring “Happy” Jim Ross as the butcher, Sir Alec Heineken, Mike Check as the store manager, Popeye as a fellow shopper, Dixie Carter as a grocery store clerk, Stubby as Sir Stubby Fairchild, RD Reynolds as Henrietta Alley Cat, and RD Reynolds (2) as the Arcade Repairman.

  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: No haiku this week, but Mr. Braxton sang to the viewers about needs and wants.

WCR Video: The "Lost Episode"

RD Reynolds shocks Blade Braxton, on the April Fools 2008 episode of Wrestlecrap Radio (#98), when he revealed the long last tape of the "actual first ever" episode of Wrestlecrap Radio from 1988.


(Video Title: "WCR Reconstructions: Introducing The "Lost Episode" (04.01.08)" by Greg Diener

And here's the "minisode" version of the same episode:


...And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!

And speaking of "lost" Mike Check is supposed to be celebrating his "7 Years Of Whackin'" Anniversary month over on The Mike Check Show but it seems that Mike is "lost in space" and...WAIT...This news just in: Mike Check has been abducted by Martians...and...does this mean that there's no more Mike Check Show?...No...He's going to be doing the show from Mars?...But how...? Does this count as parole violation?...I don't care! The Martians can keep him!

271 Marcho Madness: March 26, 2018

Uh Oh!

91 minutes

RD and Blade do not like basketball much. This definitely has nothing to do with their hometown teams sucking. (Or in RD's case following multiple bad teams at once.) Blade brought it up however as an excuse to portray "Marcho Madness" if he were an old western prospector (and possibly owning a mine called The Danger Zone. Motto: "Can you (be able to) dig it?"). RD remembers when Mark Jindrak was an evil basketball player in WCW, though he's missing recordings of it. At least they also have Shaq's surprise WrestleMania appearance, Dennis Rodman in the nWo, and Stan "Kronkie" pissing off old man Vince.

This month it's Patrick Stewart's turn to promotional considerate with the all new Pontiac Montana Del Fantasma with "all new air filters!" (:06)

RD's latest writing, this week of hat wearing ECW Champion Vince McMahon was an excuse for him to post an image of Kristal Marshall. (:10) Blade randomly remembered when she doused herself in blue paint during the Diva Search, then blames others for driving him to drink.

RD took a TRIP to Jungle Jim's (International Market), causing Blade to interrupt him with laughter. (:13) There he bought a (glass) bottle of root beer from Chowning's Tavern, which when taste tested is pungent and tastes like unwanted root beer bubblegum.

Sad News: One time while touring Blade found Bart's Root Beer with no caffeine in it. Sadder News: According to RD's investigative Googling he learns he actually took a sugar free (and caffeine free) one instead. (:20)

Obscure Nestlé News: RD found the connection between the corporation name and their nest logo. Wait till he finds out about Nescafé and Nespresso! (:23) Blade has some "serious business" to complete and wants to auction off some deep frozen Universal Studios crunch bars he found in his folks' fridge 20 years ago.

65 year old Ricky Steamboat whom Blade respected as a child defeated "The Duke" (:27) The two wonder which Duke it was. My money is on Edmund.

Aspiring necromancer Eric Sims wants to bring Doink back, initially confusing RD. Blade has to clarify, further confusing RD. (:31)

Tammy's back in the slammy again. (That sounded better in my head.) (:34) Things have gotten so bad the duo initially think she was jailed for an earlier offense.

Despite putting them in the itinerary and having their MIDI music played, Blade's friend Cory Udler is unable to make the time as Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley to report on TNA news, of which I can't blame him. (:38) Thus RD instead calls up a Patreon patron by the name of Sean Stein to do so instead. One of the rewards of being a $50 tier WC sponsor is "a one-time guest shot on WrestleCrap Radio", so he appears on what Blade randomly calls "The Stein Line" (Blade reveals he's still stuck on "TV Guide time" where each day starts at 5 am).

Sean tried watching TNA once and found himself stuck watching looping advertising promos for an older and no longer running show. No comment. He went to their YouTube page where a recent upload is for "Christian Cage Theme Song and Entrance Video (2006)". No comment. The trio wonder how similar it is to his old WWE theme, fitting in to TNA's music guy literally phoning it in by making more rip-off themes than Jimmy Hart.

RD: "Keep your Johnson where it is."

Sean is gracious as RD keeps his number in his little black book for future use.

Robert Sternburg asks about Gorilla Monsoon's toilet technique and the Co-Fruitcakes miss the obvious joke about him being in the Gorilla Position to do so in. (:54) Blade prefers his toilet paper to be sturdy. "I don't want to be the Jim Morrison of wiping, right?" he reasons.

Blade wants to hire out (Hungry Hungry) Ken Patera to swing children around in full nelsons. (:57) RD thinks that should be part of the auction. Blade remembers a magazine wondering if Patera would wrestle Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania IV. Also he recently hung out with Frank From LA.

Goldberg will NOT be inducted into the marketing gimmick Hall Of Fame by Braun the Leprechaun or by my guess of Eric Bischoff, but by Paul Heyman. But of course. (:66) Blade is angered into confusion by this. RD remembers when Bobby Heenan was inducted by Blackjack John Lanza and he absolutely hated it.

RD: "Like we know what we are talking about."

The two wonder who should be celebrity inducted into the Hall Of Fame instead. This is not a repeat from last month when they also did this. (:71)

Blade: "I like to come behind you."

RD wants Burt Reynolds with himself inducting him of course, with his actual Smokey and the Bandit theme (confusing Blade again as it is not Jerry Reed's Eastbound and Down); Herb by Clara Peller or the currently reigning Burger King; and Elvira by Jesse Ventura.

Blade wants Bill Fralic by Stone Cold Austin; Cyndi Lauper by Dave Wolff (since Roddy Piper is no longer with us); and Susan St. James by Mike Adamle. The two wonder how little St. James has been on the radio progrem, as well as Lauper playing nearby Blade opening for Rod Stewart, RD going to see Weird Al perform soon, and Blade having gone to around 20 Misfits concerts. All very...fascinating stuff, no?

Seventeen More Syllables (RD: "Mike Check would be proud"):
Kid Rock Hall Of Fame.
Bob with the bob the bang to
Bang shitty (shitty).



$31.00 plus that $19.99 The Price Is Right


...Uh Oh! 
 
 
 

Facts & Figures (as compiled by Erik Majorwitz)

 

  • WrestleCrap Radio Sponsors: 5. Patreon, wrestlecrapradio.com, eBay, Dinosaur Dracula, Day of the Dead
  • URLs not taken: 0.
  • SPEAKING OFs: 5. Overstaying the welcome, obscure Nestle news, obscure wrestling news, trouble, concerts
  • Dave Meltzer, not talking about: 0.
 
  • Phone Calls & Run Ins: 2. Stewart Patrick, Sean Stein

  • Blade Time Outs:  5
  • RD Time Outs:  1
  • RJ Fletcher, Yes Man:  1
  • Krankor Laughs: 
  • Weird Al Laughs:  1
  • Mama’s Broken Damn Damn Damn Dishes:  2
  • Cricket Chirps:  3
  • WrestleCrap Gongs:  2
  • RD False Finishes:  1
  • Susan St. James Uh Ohs:  4
  • George!:  4
 
  • Question of the Week from: Robert Sternburg
    • Do you think Gorilla Monsoon used the bunch method or the folding method when wiping?  I’m a big bunch method guy because I’m scared my fingers will break through the toilet tissue.  Thoughts? Blade: Quad ply or bust for me.
 
  • WrestleCrap 3 Count:  :  3 celebrities you’d like to see in the WWE Hall of Fame.
    • RD:  Burt Reynolds, Herb From Burger King, Elvira.
    • Blade:  Susan St. James, Cyndi Lauper, Bill Fralic.
 
  • Blade Braxton’s Weekly Wrestling Haiku: Apparently, Kid Rock isn’t worthy of induction:
    Kid Rock Hall Of Fame.
    Bob with the bob the bang to
    Bang shitty (shitty).

WCR Video: Ghetto Amusement Park He-Man & Skeletor (WCR #63 & #101)

As written by "Blade Braxton" (taken from here):

"If you listened to the radio show (Wrestlecrap Radio: Episode #63. May 18, 2007), you heard my sad tale of the Ghetto Amusement Park Skeletor and He-Man. I went to the park expecting a giant Mattel Toys sponsored event, with neato, bright, and flashy officially licensed costumed characters. What I got, was the nightmare fuel you see below. For your further amusement, behold the horrors...



There's the Lord Of Destruction himself, Ghetto Amusement Park Skeletor, looking a little more flesh colored than usual, looking like he lost a few teeth due to not being able to put down the crack pipe, and he's dressed kind of like Dracula. This was a few seconds before the smurfer started chasing me around the merry-go-round in an obvious cocaine-fueled rage. Who could save me?



Not this assclown, Ghetto Amusement Park He-Man, who looks like he pawned the Power Sword for an ounce of weed. By the Power Of Potheads!!!!!!!!!!! Oh yeah, nice orange tank top underneath the armor there, "He-Man."

And believe it or not, even more frightening than Skeletor, was Ghetto Amusement Park Man-At-Arms. In a sane world, you could count on Man-At-Arms to save the day.



In this bizarro world I experienced that day, Ghetto Man-At-Arms has shaved his head, put on some mascara around his eyes and on top of his chrome dome, and striked a muscular pose like he was trying to woo a potential customer while he was man-whoring himself out on the point. I don't even want to know about the handcuffs he's wearing. Sigh, what a fraud-filled 1980's afternoon at Joyland, the Ghetto Amusement Park!!!!!!!"

(R.V.M Kai) Thanks Blade. The following WCR Video is taken from episode #63 as well as Blade's retelling of the "Ghetto Amusement Park" story almost a year later on episode #101 (April 25, 2008), which also includes a story of Blade's sister almost being "no longer being with us" after falling out of a ride...Oh, the days before health and safety standards.


(Video by R.V.M Kai)

And "speaking of the word "ghetto", it seems that Mike Check was inspired by this video to play "In the Ghetto" by Elvis Presley on THE MIKE CHECK SHOW!

...And also be sure to visit here for the WCR Video archives!